The article discusses the divorce of a couple from Newquay, Cornwall, England. What is interesting is the extent that the online virtual world and the real world interact for them. For example, the couple initially met online in 2003 and then moved in together within months. They spent hours together online in Second Life and then, about two years later, they married in both real life and in Second Life. However, she suspected that he was cheating in the virtual life so her virtual character hired a virtual private detective to investigate his online adultery. She then later caught her husband's avatar having sex with a call girl in the game. She has filed for divorce but she has already found a new man, in the online game World Of Warcraft.
The article does not explicitly mention whether the divorce is in real life and/or Second Life. Also, there is no mention, or even indication, that any sort of game addiction was involved with either the wife or the husband. Nonetheless, I found this article interesting in that if there is such an overlap between the virtual and real worlds in their case, imagine how it might be for somebody who is actually addicted and spends most of their waking hours immersed in a virtual world!
- John O.
[em]Carpe Diem![/em] (Seize the Day!)
Very strange.
The question is....will you be able/courageous/adult enough to sacrifice that which merely pleases you...for that which will truly fulfill you? That is the question of personal growth.
~~~Dem518
~~~wow-free since 8/22/09
I'm not proud to say that I've seen the X-Rated areas of Second Life. They're pretty awful. Take Internet porn addiction and combine it with gaming addiction. That's what you have here, interactive and highly addictive. Do people know whether their kids or spouses are visiting these places in Second Life?
The happiness of a man in this life does not consist in the absence but in the mastery of his passions.
-Alfred Lord Tennyson
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I am really neive about this, but how on earth do you have sex in a computer game?
Liz Woolley
self gratification
Take the first step in faith. You donaEU(tm)t have to see the whole staircase, just take the first step.
Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.
Laughter gives us distance. It allows us to step back from an event, deal with it and then move on.
~Bob Newhart
The minute you alter your perception of yourself and your future, both you and your future begin to change. ~Marilee Zdenek
Oh. Thanks.
Liz Woolley
I prefer real sex and real life... I mean, I like to play games on my computer, but not actually living my life in a computer if you get my point. If it were for me, I would ban Second Life from the web because it has secondary negative effects on people and their lives. ============================================= [color=blue]Admin Warning - Illegal website removed[/color] =============================================
*LOL* forgive me for laughing... Why don't we ban Internet, wouldn't that save the world? :P
I remember when there was no internet. I remember when we did not have a TV....or hot running water.... or a bathroom..... no furnace...... I grew up with 9 people living in a three bedroom house......
Liz Woolley
So Liz..... was it all better then in the old days? That's the question we keep asking ourselves over and over...
I think it was. More time was spent actually surviving. We were forced to communicate and be social with each other, because there was nothing else to do. We played a LOT of cards and board games. Also spent a LOT of time out side, going on "walking" adventure trips, and meeting the neighbors and doing things with them. We acted like a social group, assisting each other and doing things together, instead of everyone holed up in their house in front of the computer.
Liz Woolley
I understand. Things have changed dramatically the last 10 years. I took a walk with a friend the other day, and walked by many "perfect" houses with the big flatscreen TV on and computers as well. It made me quite sad...
Real sex or cyber sex? HUGH! That's not a choice, its an addiction to even consider it a serious issue! shiver.... May I never be tempted (again?) Diana
This story is really strange and a bit extreme but I guess what started through an action in a game ended for an action in a game.
An hour of gaming is an hour wasted.
Well it all depends how imaginative you are, how creative a writer you are and moreover how much you enjoy writing. I used to roleplay romantic scenes, much like an actor would but they were different to what you are describing, we would have a fade to black at the appropriate point. When you are interacting with a generally immersive, imaginative and reciprocal roleplayer who does not hog the scene, then you would be surprised how entertaining it can be. Two of my previous relationships have started from such beginnings, again though when I say this, I find it hard to understand why a married man, who was honestly happy with his partner, could sacrifice that for a virtual partner. Yet if the couples relationship in this article was already struggling, well then it was just an outlet for the eventual break up. Also part of the addiction for me and I am talking about all kinds of roleplaying here, elves, dwarves, politics, guild leadership, crime etc, was that when you are a proficient and regular roleplayer, you do make so many contacts and people wanting to do a scene with you, it draws you in more than anything else I could name. I do miss roleplaying a good deal, I know its no substitute for a social network, yet for me, the expression of something through the written word, can sometimes contain more depth, than my bumbling attempt at conversation usually will.
MJ, if you enjoy roleplaying, I bet you would LOVE theater! There are so many community theater groups out there, and a lot of them are holding open auditions right now for spring shows or revues. You probably couldn't expect to walk right in and be the star right away, but it sounds like this is something that might be just your thing. Maybe try it! Jane in CT
Well this specific case is easy to understand, they first met on second life and when she caught him cheating in the same virtual environment she couldn't forgive him. Well I don't know about the virtual world, but in real life most women would do the same. As long as they don't get the appreciation they deserve they won't tolerate this kind of mistakes. Many experts can tell you how to save your marriage but in the end you have to have the strength and will to do it. [color=blue] Admin: Stealth link to a website OLGA does not endorse has been removed. [/color]
It sounds so technical.
Liz Woolley
LOL isn't sex always technical?
One of my biggest fears is for college students who are required to create an account in order to take part in online classes. They will come for the assignment, but they will come back for what they see while they are there.
I'm far too enthusiastic about the real-life experience to give a totally unbiased opinion here
I dont see how a computer game can ever reproduce the sensuality ( touch, sounds, taste etc) of real life sex.
It saddens me that game designers are even attempting to recreate the physical and emotional intimacy of being touched by a real life person.
IMO most ingame intimacy is a derivative of porn.
Game designers know exactly what they are doing. How different is sexual type interaction in Second Life that different from watching and chatting with a stripper online?
It is sad some of us are vulnerable to that addiction, but lets call it what it is.
- dark
Olga/non member since Dec. 2008 Check out my latest video on Gaming Addiction and public awareness https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g-6JZLnQ29o
The game designers at least in SL are truely amazing in what they have come up with for the avatars to have animated sex in just about any act or positions you can imagine. I spent much of my time in SL as what I called at the time an "escort". Now I look back and realize I was nothing but a prostitute who actually promoted and invested in all the gimicks of that trade just to make money there.
There are certainly many in SL that come to SL just for the sexual gratifications free or paid for to someone like my avatar. I now feel remorse for my behavior there as it is nothing like who I am in RL but the game makes it easy to let you think you can do all these things without remorse or consequences.
"Fall seven times and stand up eight."
Japanese Proverbs
Monica although there are lots of perverts there I also saw people who maybe had a curiosity or wanted to explore the darker side in SL. They don't realize that they are diminishing themselves and that there is a consequence always. I'm glad you left it behind and moved on. I wish you well in your new life.
however to be honest, written words can be very romantic as Mj191 says and as for cyber sex - it's true it doesn't take the place of the real thing but it can be an expression of intimacy for those participating in it in the romantic sense. (not the porn sense). I think women usually think it more in the romantic sense but men probably look at it more like porn. /me laughs
the mind is a powerful thing which is why it is so easy to get carried away in these interactive gaming sites.
And also to be fair these sites can be creative and imaginative outlets in many ways for those who can keep a balance.
but they also can really pull in the hurt and vulnerable people and although some say it can be therapeutic in a psycho drama kind of way I only saw that it brought more "drama" and negativity to them. I was hurting too but although there are some decent people there many are willing to play on other's insecurities and anxieties also.
Ooo, this sounds like you might know Firan or SoI or Ateraan or Dartmud... you name it. Would be the first time I find someone on here who is addicted to MUDs as well.
Gamer since 1998, last day of MMORPGs Aug 23rd, last day of any computer games Nov 27th 2010.
From my understanding MMORPGs like SL and WoW originated from MUD games.
And you're right.
I've came here after hearing about the supposed divorce and searched the internet to find out whether it was a true or fake. Thought my friend were just joking with me!
I really couldn't believe the first time I read it, but well, I guess addicted people could really go across the common sense limits!
-Dionisio Tolomei
I've seen this article before. I'm not surprised in the least! This is a tame story actually compared to some I've heard. I'm also not proud to see what I've seen in SL. It's a sick and twisted game that gets into your mind and takes you down. I AM proud to say I'm not there anymore.
And Liz...how can we begin to tell you how that happens here in a blog? lol
"Even when you think it's about you, it's not about you." Dr. Bill
I think the strange thing is not that they 'played out' something that would have made sense in real life in a game, but that real life itself (for so many people) is similar to what can be described in a pixelated game.
It just goes to show how much of vapid living people accept as 'normal'. There is a HUGE connection between these two things I feel. Games and scenarios like this work so well because real life narratives have been dumbed down so much and how people imagine relationships has become so devoid of meaning. That's why something intimate with another human being can be just depicted in a stereotypical, stupid way, and so many people can obsessively be into that.
(I notice that what I posted came from a fairly angry/bitter place - both with myself and others.)