&: GAMERS!! - READ ME FIRST - We need YOUR help.

27 posts / 0 new
Last post
Diggo McDiggity
Diggo McDiggity's picture
Offline
Last seen: 2 years 5 months ago
GrandparentOLGA member
Joined: 07/04/2002 - 9:43am
&: GAMERS!! - READ ME FIRST - We need YOUR help.

There have been a number of articles recently about gaming. We know this. While many of these articles may sound contrary to things you feel about gaming, understand that these articles aren't written by us and don't necessarily represent our opinions about gaming here at OLGA. Remember that most of us, including me, one of OLGA's founders, are gamers. I'm a gamer and I love gaming, and have for years. But for me, I let my gaming get way out of control and it caused many problems in my life. I've since managed to overcome my issues, and am now trying to help others who are now where I have been. We aren't here to attack gaming or to take games away. We're here to help those folks and families with whom gaming has gotten out of control, and has caused problems. That's really all we're tryng to do here. That's not to say that there aren't games we really wished didn't exist. Some of them are just plain awful, but it's not our job to tell you what to play. So we need your help just to remember that we aren't adversaries here. We're just like you trying to help folks whose gaming has gotten out of hand. If we can help otherwise, please let us know. Thanks, Ron

Co-Founder of OLGA and member since 2002

LukeKellylives
Offline
Last seen: 15 years 10 months ago
OLGA member
Joined: 06/24/2007 - 3:57pm
Re: GAMERS!! - READ ME FIRST - We need YOUR help.

It's about time. This is the MOST logical argument from this point of view I've ever seen. Thank you for not being so uptight about games. I've seen people say that games are the cause of all violence, should be taken off the market, etc. Mostly, it's just a scapegoat for bad parents or messed up kids. It's the easy way out. However, I do understand that it actually IS a problem with some people, and they DO actually need help. But, again, thank you for being reasonable about this. Sincerely, Chris.

nitesweats67
Offline
Last seen: 15 years 10 months ago
OLGA member
Joined: 06/24/2007 - 4:52pm
Re: GAMERS!! - READ ME FIRST - We need YOUR help.

hi all. i just wanted to say that this is my first time to the site and that i appreciate your impute. i am nearly 40 years old and a gamer since Dand D was a paperback. roughly 30 years or more now. but as far as gaming is conserned i really dont feal that GAMING is an addiction. only a symptom.. i have known for many years that i have a compulsive personality disorder as many people have. but gaming has been the focus of my compulsion as of yet. It could have been drugs, women, gambling, ect. but as luck may have it. its only online games. i dont think I can controll this compulsion as it fills a hole in my life that involves comoradory, and a group of friends that my job/jobs cant allow me to create or hold for very long. im a OTR trucker. so thanks again for your imput and ill be watching in the days ahead. "if ya gotta go, go with a smile"A Jack Nicolson. .... Batman.

Ryan44z
Offline
Last seen: 15 years 10 months ago
OLGA member
Joined: 07/09/2007 - 11:59am
Re: GAMERS!! - READ ME FIRST - We need YOUR help.

Sure sounds like you are addicted.

Conan
Offline
Last seen: 15 years 2 months ago
OLGA member
Joined: 07/16/2007 - 7:16am
Re: GAMERS!! - READ ME FIRST - We need YOUR help.

Hey, I'm not sure whether this is the best place to post this, but I'll give it a go. I've got WoW ordered yesterday so should start playing soon. I'm not a hardcore gamer and I know my limits. I'm just wondering whether anyone would have any advice for me in regards to preventing me from getting "hooked" on this MMORPG? I know there's loads of hype surrounding WoW but I don't intend to get caught up in it if and when I start playing WoW. I look forward to hearing your comments.

BigH501
BigH501's picture
Offline
Last seen: 12 years 4 months ago
OLGA member
Joined: 12/15/2006 - 10:31am
Re: GAMERS!! - READ ME FIRST - We need YOUR help.

[size=14]
What advice would you give somebody, who didn't want to get "hooked" if they told you they were thinking of trying Cocaine or Heroine ? I am not saying WoW is as bad as drugs, but the insidious nature of the game is that if it is going to hook you, it will do so in such a way that you never see the hook. You will just look up one day and wonder where your life went. I would guess a lot of people who get hooked just start out trying it for fun a hour or two here and there. Then the time warp effect sets in and you "feel" like you were on for 20 min, but when you check the clock it was more like hours, maybe quite a few of them. Or you might be somebody who just doesn't have it in them to get hooked and you will wonder what all the "hooked" talk was about anyway. [/size]

" ... don't question it just go" "... where the body goes the mind will follow"
.
Borrowed from "Desire to Stop"

LoriDee
Offline
Last seen: 14 years 8 months ago
OLG-Anon member
Joined: 07/06/2007 - 1:04pm
Re: GAMERS!! - READ ME FIRST - We need YOUR help.

I guess what I'd recommend is that you look for the signs. Problem is, if you become addicted, the signs are there but you blind yourself to them. If you're the kind of person who would become addicted, it could be dangerous. Look for: Do I feel the "time warp" when I play, i.e., do I lose track of time during play?
Do I end up playing longer than I'd planned to?
Do I find the game more of anything (fulfilling, fun, engaging, stimulating...) than Real Life?
Do I lie to anyone, including myself to play, i.e., I'm only going to play for an hour, and then don't, or I won't play after 10 pm but then do?
Have your friends or family said anything to you about your play? Anybody else want to add?

lifeislife
Offline
Last seen: 15 years 10 months ago
OLGA member
Joined: 06/03/2007 - 2:36am
Re: GAMERS!! - READ ME FIRST - We need YOUR help.

Am I preoccupied with the game, even when I dont play? (thinking about the game all the time)
Do I play, even when I have more important things to do?
Do I avoid doing things I normally like to do (meeting people, going to a party, seeing family etc.) in order to be able to play?
Do I continue to play despite pains in shoulder/arm/back/eyes? If you can answer "yes" to one or more of these questions (including the ones LoriDee listed) it might be clever for you to stop playing before you get too deeply engaged in the game ... Remember that WoW is a time trap. In the beginning it is quite "easy" and you can get away with playing a bit and still progress in the game. When you get further (higher levels) more and more time is needed to fulfill your tasks and it will feel increasingly difficult to quit, since you already spend x hours on your character/items. When you get into a guild, even more time has to be invested. The further you get, the more energy will the game take and the more difficult will it be to quit. I never played WoW myself (I tried it at a friends place just when it came out and knew immidiately that I would have to avoid it like I avoid crack and heroine), but a lot of my good friends play or played. Most of them say that they wish they had never started because they ended up spending WAY more time than they planned when they began. Watch out. ;)

Katesha
Offline
Last seen: 15 years 10 months ago
OLGA member
Joined: 04/14/2007 - 11:08pm
Re: GAMERS!! - READ ME FIRST - We need YOUR help.

Good morning! The fact that you even had to ask how not to get hooked raised a red flag for me. If you are concerned that you might get addicted to World of Warcraft, it would be best if you never even started. Kathy
Recovering Gaming Addict
WOW free since March 22

lifeislife
Offline
Last seen: 15 years 10 months ago
OLGA member
Joined: 06/03/2007 - 2:36am
Re: GAMERS!! - READ ME FIRST - We need YOUR help.
"Katesha " wrote:

Good morning!

? I tend to forget that we have a time difference :D Here we have late afternoon, but good morning to you Kathy!

Conan
Offline
Last seen: 15 years 2 months ago
OLGA member
Joined: 07/16/2007 - 7:16am
Re: GAMERS!! - READ ME FIRST - We need YOUR help.

Hey, Thank you to all those who have posted. That was interesting and certainly provides food for thought. Thanks again.

ryvnn
Offline
Last seen: 2 months 3 weeks ago
OLG-Anon member
Joined: 07/30/2007 - 3:22pm
Re: GAMERS!! - READ ME FIRST - We need YOUR help.

Yeah, I would recommend not playing at all. If your gut is telling you to ask these questions, chances are, you will be hooked. It's telling you that for a reason.

ancientone
ancientone's picture
Offline
Last seen: 15 years 8 months ago
OLGA member
Joined: 10/19/2007 - 6:58pm
Re: GAMERS!! - READ ME FIRST - We need YOUR help.
"Conan " wrote:

Hey, I'm not sure whether this is the best place to post this, but I'll give it a go. I've got WoW ordered yesterday so should start playing soon. I'm not a hardcore gamer and I know my limits. I'm just wondering whether anyone would have any advice for me in regards to preventing me from getting "hooked" on this MMORPG? I know there's loads of hype surrounding WoW but I don't intend to get caught up in it if and when I start playing WoW. I look forward to hearing your comments.

I know you don't want to hear this but if you play certain things will just happen. It just a matter of time. As someone in this forum has stated: Interesting game....The only winning move is not to play.

HailfallsonTheHorde
Offline
Last seen: 15 years 10 months ago
TrollOLGA member
Joined: 04/10/2008 - 3:17pm
Re: GAMERS!! - READ ME FIRST - We need YOUR help.

Everyone blames games for there problems and addictions..NOOOOOO...I sick of it...I'm tried of people blaming games for kids shooting up schools IT'S THE KIDS MENTAL STATUS!!! not a game or movie...The games don't have an addiction in them it's people that get them to start out with...

Gamersmom
Gamersmom's picture
Offline
Last seen: 2 months 2 weeks ago
AdministratorOLG-Anon member
Joined: 07/15/2006 - 12:33am
You apparently didn't read

You apparently didn't read Diggo's original post in this thread, Hail. Thanks for stopping by. [color=blue] Buh-bye. [/color]

"Small service is true service while it lasts.  Of humblest friends, bright creature! scorn not one

The daisy, by the shadow that it casts,

Protects the lingering dewdrop from the sun." -------William Wordsworth

muststopgaming
Offline
Last seen: 7 years 2 months ago
OLGA member
Joined: 03/30/2009 - 12:08am
Latency or "lag" (really

Latency or "lag" (really slow game performance or a time difference between when you click the mouse and when your character moves) is the most frustrating part of games. A good advice can be to replace the computer with a slower one that still can access the internet but can't play any games. I have a Pentium 4 with 512mb of RAM that's really good for the internet and word but can't run any games. I think it tends to over heat too much... For people who's significant other plays too much you can try to create artificial lag by downloading LEGAL stuff off bit-torrent. Hopefully, that'll take up the bandwidth from his/her game.

Xandtar
Offline
Last seen: 9 years 7 months ago
OLGA member
Joined: 04/09/2003 - 7:42am
Unfortunately, that's often

Unfortunately, that's often just a patch. I know I often tried to find the most cardboardy, tasteless game on the most clunky computer system, just so I would be able to play and not stay and stay and stay. But no matter how bad the game, if I had to have a gaming fix it would do. The only safety for me is in not playing at all. The reward is seeing progress in my real life.

Leveling in Real Life

player
Offline
Last seen: 14 years 6 months ago
OLGA member
Joined: 09/25/2009 - 10:18am
Hi Xandtar, I feel that we

Hi Xandtar,

I feel that we have something in common in that regard. I just joined the forum and my main problem is the time I spend online playing games. I was able to stay off for a while by not having any games installed in my computer. I used to play a lot of chess (1-2 min games) and now I moved to Catan (online board game).

They are both quick to end but I end up playing them repeatedly over and over again. From what I have been reading it looks like I am trying to replace failures in my real life with "wins" in online games.

I am not sure if I can quit completely right now, I feel that if I am able to gear my life towards something sucessful I might be able to quit for good but for now my feeling is that I really need those quick fixes.

Is there any piece of advice you can give? (btw, I gave up TV two years ago and now I only have a 1 time /month netflix, that was taking all my time after I came home from work), I feel that I can get addicted to anything, from chocolate/ice cream to online gaming. I'm glad I don't drink or smoke and now I really see how difficult it must be for those that do.

lisefrac
Offline
Last seen: 13 years 2 months ago
OLGA member
Joined: 04/24/2009 - 12:12pm
and now I moved to

and now I moved to Catan

You know, Settlers of Catan was originally a board game. You know, the kind with real physical bits, that you play with other people, face to face ;) Maybe look into finding a local board game group, maybe at a local college or game store? At least you will get some socialization in this way :)

exrpgfein
exrpgfein's picture
Offline
Last seen: 14 years 4 months ago
Outreach
Joined: 10/02/2009 - 2:28am
Hello every1, I just wanted

Hello every1, I just wanted to post some valuble information that has helped me out, for any1 whos having trouble with a gaming addiction, or any addiction 4 that matter.

Basically what it comes down to is this:

If your addicted to a game from WoW to Super mario bros. to tetris or whatever, It has almost nothing to do with the game it's self. Its the hole in your life that your trying to fill with gaming. I know because it's what i've done almost all my life with pot anime and video games. Its taken me a long time to get where I am today, where I have control over my gaming.

The best way to start is one simple rule. For every minute of gaming, TV, anything that you find addicting that can just take over all of your time, you do 1 minute of stuff that is progressive. Exercise, Clean your room, homework, anything that you would usually avoid so you could game.

Its really hard at 1st recording, adding, subtracting, etc. but in the end it will be a great step to gaining control over your life. Also by using this rule, every time you game, its not that feeling of guilt, but more of an annoyance, but a progressive annoyance. Because the more you game, the more time you have to spend doing things that help you to live a better life.

Sorry to ramble on but I just wanted to fully/ thoroughly exsplain the idea. And this is just a starter strategy for gaining your life back. I have much more info on addiction and would be happy to share anything else i know about addictions. Also I recomend you read "In the relm of Hungry Ghosts" By Gabor Mate. That book changed my life and is incredibly valuable to any1 with any addiction.

michael
michael's picture
Offline
Last seen: 13 years 11 months ago
OLGA member
Joined: 10/20/2008 - 2:54pm
exrpgfein -nice insight -

exrpgfein -nice insight - but for me abstinence is the key from gaming. I dont understand the concept of one game, or 5 min of one game...im off to the races once i start...I have NO control...sucks, but hey, I live with it -and understand it now...See, once you state you have no control...you win.

Be Good to yourself! Rule #62: "Don't take yourself too **** seriously! " 12x12 Book And dont forget to donate... Donate

Arco
Arco's picture
Offline
Last seen: 9 years 5 months ago
OLGA member
Joined: 10/10/2009 - 4:45am
right now im looking at this

right now im looking at this the same as i would with substance abuse.

i think my signature should say it all

for some people 1 minute of gaming is too much and 1000 is never enough

Mickey
Mickey's picture
Offline
Last seen: 13 years 8 months ago
OLGA member
Joined: 09/17/2009 - 9:03am
once you state you have no

once you state you have no control...you win.

well said, michael!

Is This What You Do With Eternity? ~Groundhog Day

Desire to Stop
Desire to Stop's picture
Offline
Last seen: 3 years 1 month ago
OLGA member
Joined: 06/15/2009 - 1:24am
Xandtar
Xandtar wrote:

Unfortunately, that's often just a patch. I know I often tried to find the most cardboardy, tasteless game on the most clunky computer system, just so I would be able to play and not stay and stay and stay. But no matter how bad the game, if I had to have a gaming fix it would do. The only safety for me is in not playing at all. The reward is seeing progress in my real life.

Pretty much this. Others have said it repeatedly. The reality is that what separates us from other gamers, those who can do things like play in moderation and not harm their lives in the process, is that we've lost the power of choice, and for many of us, once we start playing we experience the phenomenon of craving. We've actually crossed the line in terms of being able do things like moderate, or play 1 hour in exchange for 1 hour of doing any other activity, etc.

If you are able to do these things, I hate to say this, but you may not actually be an addict--you might be a problem gamer, but if you still have the power of choice in all this (or at least believe that you do) then you might not yet be an addict. If that is the case, the solutions for problem gamers are often quite different than for those who be real addicts. Things like parental controls might work for you quite well. I know exactly what I did with parental controls I tried to impose on myself.

My thought is that anyone who is wondering exactly which class they are in should try some controlled gaming. Try to play for a short time and then stop abruptly. Try it repeatedly. As it says in the Big Book, it might be well worth a case of jitters to get full knowledge of your condition.

Cheers, Desire to Stop
ALL quoted text (unless otherwise stated) comes from the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous (with wording sometimes changed only to make it more relevant for gaming addiction). I will include page numbers.

Hoping & praying for a measure of recovery for all of us today.

R_1
Offline
Last seen: 5 years 1 month ago
OLGA member
Joined: 10/19/2009 - 5:17am
The last time I played some

The last time I played some online game was about 1 week ago...

I know it is good for me not to play at all...

But it is hard sometimes...

But It's good to know that all I need is to take care of today, only 24 hours...

And it helps. It's getting better, slowly...

J 8,36

Mario
Mario's picture
Offline
Last seen: 12 years 10 months ago
OLGA member
Joined: 09/26/2010 - 6:23pm
I played 4 months ago. I

I played 4 months ago. I believe it was an MMORPG. I seem to be having no problem not played at this time. I am grateful for my recovery rate and I don't expect to be playing anytime soon.

Mario

BrokenFree
Offline
Last seen: 10 years 10 months ago
OLG-Anon memberOLGA member
Joined: 05/07/2013 - 10:28pm
Same here Mario it's been

Same here Mario it's been four months since I last played a MMOFPS. Took a year of hard work on myself to make a clean brake from it, I did lose a couple of years of my life to my habbit and money. I'm just glad I'm in a much better space now.

I don't blame games for my habbit it basicaly all leads down to me not having placed limits on my playing time. I still come online to do my work. But it is nice to not have that itch, for the need to play.

" Life Begins Outside Your Comfort Zone"

Topic locked