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Wisdom from the chatroom
Perseverance: Are we willing to persevere in recovery?
As addicts, we don't persevere in anything, except making sure that we get to game. Everything else in life becomes secondary to that. When we quit, the first thing we must persevere in is not gaming, not going back. We have to remember why we quit, how bad it was before, and how much better it is now. Sometimes it doesn't feel better immediately; we may face withdrawal symptoms and depression. After all, we kept going until our bodies were a mess, our minds were much, our spouses and friends were disgusted. It will get better. We have to take it one day at a time.
Most of us have had a relapse. We have learned that there are certain behaviors we can't keep or they will lead us back to gaming. We must eliminate these triggering behaviors and stay away from them.
As we get farther away from games, there are other challenges. We begin to realize that we have messed up our lives; we begin to see our previous insane thinking more clearly. And these realizations also come with things that need to change. Character defects, areas of growth. These are slow to come along and it's hard to stick with working on them. We slowly begin to learn a new way of life.
As we continue in the program, we sometimes allow our recovery to falter. We may feel we have made it--things are going well right now, and we don't need recovery activities as much. But this thinking can lead us down the wrong path. Eventually we come to understand that there is a pattern: Our sobriety from games, our serenity and peace, comes from the help we have received in our program: From meditation, keeping in touch with the fellowship and our sponsor, prayer, going to meetings, working the steps, exercise and healthy eating and many other places. These are the things that kept us away from games at first, and they are the things we will need to continue to live a sane life. Finally we see that we must persevere in working our program for the rest of our lives.
Question: How have I persevered so far during my recovery? Do I continue to want to recover so badly that I am willing to do anything to pursue it?
Action: Make sure you have done the basics of your program today.
Prayer: Higher Power, help me to persevere. Remind me that perseverance will lead me to recovery. Help me to follow my program and do my part today.
I am a recovering computer game and gambling addict. My recovery birthday: On May 6, 2012 I quit games and began working a program of recovery through OLGA No computer games or slot games for me since December 12, 2012. No solitaire games with real cards since June 2013.