First aid kit for spouses and significant others of video game addicts

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Polga
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First aid kit for spouses and significant others of video game addicts

If your husband, wife or significant other is a video game addict you have come to the right place to find support and real experience.

We are glad you found us !

If you take some time to read our stories you may be able to find peace, instead of being a part of the madness that gaming addiciton brings to our families. In this thread, there are several good links to threads that may help you understand your situation and options.

These forums record so many experiences of the loved ones of video game addicts, over the years; members who have had the courage to share their situations or offer support and a sense that we are not alone, that we are not the only one to suffer  A big "Thank you!" to all those people who have given their time.

If you do not have so much time to search the forums, you can use the following selected threads to learn what you can do and start you on your journey to peace and sanity.

When you have a better understanding of the possible options, we would encourage you to make a plan for how you are going to tackle your situation; give it some time and consideration before you act. Here is an example of a plan (click here)  Think of possible consequences. Get support.

You need to sign up for free membership to view most of them and then you will also be able to access the member only forums and post on the forums. We do this because we sometimes need a safe space from people who do not understand our problem and might give inappropriate comments or advice.

Our 'welcome advice' for spouses and significant others of video gaming addicts is here:

http://www.olganon.org/spouses_of_excessive_gamers

Your partner is a gaming addict. How to GET SUPPORT for YOU:

http://www.olganon.org/forum/discussion-spousessignificant-others-olg-anon-members-only/your-partner-gaming-addict-how-get

Learn how to look after yourself and deal with the video game addict in a healthy way:

Interventions: about communicating your concerns about their addiction to video games, to the addict

http://www.olganon.org/forum/discussion-spousessignificant-others-olg-anon-members-only/interventions-and-communication-sos

Stop your part in keeping the gaming addict in addiction (stop enabling them)

http://www.olganon.org/forum/discussion-spousessignificant-others-olg-anon-members-only/about-enabling-spousessos-addicted

Start to “Detach with love”. In this thread, find out what that means and how you can do it.

http://www.olganon.org/forum/discussion-spousessignificant-others-olg-anon-members-only/detachment-what-means-and-how-do-it

Understand and enforce boundaries in your relationship. Protect your space from unwelcome interactions.

http://www.olganon.org/forum/discussion-spousessignificant-others-olg-anon-members-only/boundaries-what-they-mean-and-how

Find out how the gamer's video game addiction negatively impacts on their children

http://www.olganon.org/forum/discussion-spousessignificant-others-olg-anon-members-only/how-gaming-addiction-parent-can

Learn more about your addict’s gaming addiction and the best way to support them

http://www.olganon.org/forum/discussion-spousessignificant-others-olg-anon-members-only/supporting-and-understanding-addict

Online affairs; are they as bad as cheating in real life?

http://www.olganon.org/forum/discussion-spousessignificant-others-olg-anon-members-only/members-experiences-and-attitudes

When their online spending is out of control

http://www.olganon.org/forum/discussion-spousessignificant-others-olg-anon-members-only/he-has-spent-37k-8-months-gaming

Deciding to stay or leave the gamer

http://www.olganon.org/forum/discussion-spousessignificant-others-olg-anon-members-only/do-i-stay-or-leave-gamer

These threads are just the start. Keep coming back !

INFO

Parent's online meeting THURSDAY 9pmEST/EDT click here

Online meetings gaming addicts click here

Spouses/SO's of addicts click here

Parents of addicts click here for advice

Help for video game addicts click here

Please help! Donate here

Coldplay3119
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At My Breaking Point

It is 5:30 am here, and I just woke up to my husband slapping his leg downstairs-he is playing Madden and obviously losing...again. He has been up all night and has not slept at all. He has work this morning, and he does excavation (not totally safe on no sleep). I was up until about 1am making a photo book for my son for his Birthday in a couple of days. We were arguing then because he was yelling, cussing, hitting himself, the couch, etc. I just can’t take it anymore.

This has been going on for YEARS. We have been married 11 years and have 3 children (a 12 year old from my previous relationship, a 6 year old, and a 4 year old). This was also a big issue at the beginning of our marriage. He took a break for quite a while and then got the game again about 6 years ago. We got into a big fight once back then, and I turned the game off. He shoved me into the wall when I was holding our baby girl. That was the only time in our marriage he has ever touched me. He left the house for a week, and when he came home, the game was gone again...for good this time I said. Fast forward to this year. It came back into the house around Christmas time, and our marriage has been going downhill ever since. There has been all-night marathon playing, yelling, screaming, cussing, breaking my coffee table, breaking theTV...you name it. I have threatened divorce more times than I care to admit. I just can’t fathom getting a divorce over a video game, but I feel I have no choice. I am lost-I don’t know what to do. I know how unhealthy this environment is for myself and my children, and I know how unhealthy this is for HIM! I have taken the game away more times than I can count-he always finds a way to get it back. He is so addicted. Please HELP!

Polga
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Welcome Coldplay

Welcome Coldplay

You need some support ! You are not alone !

 This thread will help you to find support and strengthen yourself and find sanity

http://www.olganon.org/forum/discussion-spousessignificant-others-olg-anon-members-only/your-partner-gaming-addict-how-get

Keep coming back and readi the links in this post above so that the information can become a part of you.

It sounds like you know what the deal is but you still are stuck. Take some small steps forward and start to make changes. xxx

INFO

Parent's online meeting THURSDAY 9pmEST/EDT click here

Online meetings gaming addicts click here

Spouses/SO's of addicts click here

Parents of addicts click here for advice

Help for video game addicts click here

Please help! Donate here

SadGamerWife
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My husband doesn't believe he can be happy without games

I used to make him happy. He became addicted at young age but wasn't playing them when we married so I had no clue. Now we are separated and he wont move home with me and our 6 kids because I wont allow video games. Qhen is enough, enough?

Artist247
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So sad...

Reading people’s stories is so sad. Although i can’t say my current status with my wife is as severe as the stories (articles) I’ve read I’m beginning to worry because this is how it’s starts right. A little playtime here and next thing you know they are up all night.  I spoke to my wife’s best friend who agreed with me. She felt she was playing way too much, although my wive has made an attempt to be on her phone when I’m present or awake. I still catch her here and there. She will spend more time in the bathroom, always seem to have upset stomach now rEason for so much time in bathroom. Intimacy is on exisant. She is always tired, she works construction and I get it it’s a physical job so it’s hard work. But...when it’s saturday night and we are in bed watching a little tv before bed...I tend to doze off...:I then wake up at 1am and she is on her phone playing a game. That’s frustrating, we have talked about it in past and I got “well I didn’t want to wake you, you were asleep!” Or “is the light bothering you?” So I’m almost at the point where it’s like forget it, have your F-n game! In past I would tell her let’s take our 2year old to the park “ok give me a Couple minutes!” Minutes would turn into an hour. So I just started to leave without her...just to come home and find her on the couch playing that stupid game. Or on the kitchen counter charging her phone while playing. Now I’m here downstairs after another Saturday night it’s 1:41am so I’m writing because she finally went to bet I had to turn tv off cuz she apparently fell asleep. I call her my wife but we are to get married in April of this year 2019. But now I’m like wait a minute should I even bother? She seems excited and eager to get all the wedding stuff prepared and taken care of. Everything is perfect except for that dam game! 

I am not sure what to do, do I just call it off? Or do I go alone because of our child he’s only two and I don’t want to break him from mom and dad being together. Another thing I thought is can anyone sue these video game companies? Is that even possible? I was just reminded of another thing, she has also made friends online...and added them to Facebook and some insta messenger crap, just like everyone else on here says is it cheating? When do you know. She told me one night when she came up that he was talking to the wife of one the gamers. “That someone had broken into their home and they fought and the gamer on the other end got hurt.” What I really wanted to say I did not, but what I was thinking was look at you knowing more about someone else than me, here I am alone!

i spoke to my wife’s friend and she herself said, “who gives 2 fs about someone across the world on line, your family is the ones you should be concerned about!” And I agree, so that’s where I’m at it’s 2am sad I can’t believe it, I have given up so much for my future wife. I stopped hanging out with my friends I stopped drinking and I even stop going to the gym...I always want to spend time with her but now it’s like I’m a part time husband. 

I don’t mind her playing the game if she would know when it’s family time and when it’s our time. I’m not sure where things will end up. But I think I will start

going out with my friends and family more and start to go to the gym, take my son out with me on weekends...it will probably hurt our relationship more but...that’s where I’m at. If she realizes what’s going on then she will come back to us, if not I’ll find her sitting on the couch lost for hours in that stupid On-Line game. But that’s where I’m at. Thanks for reading I wish all the best. 

Good day and or goodnight 

Artist247

Polga
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@ SadGamerWife. It sounds

@ SadGamerWife. It sounds like you need to work out what is right for you and not what he or anyone else tells you is 'the right thing'. Keep coming back to learn more and then you can make a plan. get some therapy if you find it hard to check in with your own feelings. Addiction messes with our minds and its hard to see things straight sometimes. You are not wrong to look after yourself .. only you can do that for yourself.

@ Artist   Thanks for sharing. It is hard to understand their crazy actions which are a product of addiction. What you say about having good times by getting about without her if she will not join you is good sense. Read about "detaching with love" linked  in the original post above. It may help you

INFO

Parent's online meeting THURSDAY 9pmEST/EDT click here

Online meetings gaming addicts click here

Spouses/SO's of addicts click here

Parents of addicts click here for advice

Help for video game addicts click here

Please help! Donate here

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