Failing college, cant control my vidya addiction

14 posts / 0 new
Last post
tcbarr
Offline
Last seen: 8 years 1 month ago
OLGA member
Joined: 10/05/2011 - 6:54pm
Failing college, cant control my vidya addiction

I woke up today, missed all my classes, didn't eat breakfast and just started playing some CoD. I played CoD all day with my online "friends", denied my girlfreinds query as to whether she should come over tonight, and then called into work at the lab in the university which I attend. I've known it for a while now that I am addicted but this semester at college, I started to skip EVERY calss about. I have a 3.1 and have never failed a class but it wont stay that way unless I do something. I keep telling myself that " i will just play less" or " I'll get everything done tomorrow" but everyday is the same song and dance.

I have a long history of additcion and am familiar with what it can do to your life. I dropped out of highschool because of a cocain addictino which later turned into a heroin/oxycontin addiction for 2 years. After being arrested several times I straightend out, got my GED, went to community college and then got accepted into Indiana University. this was the happiest time of my life. a couple years into my studies I thought " hey, I used to like games as a kid, I'll get a PS3" this was fine for another semester until I got internet at my place, then I started straying away form the activities iin my life that i really had interest in. My 75g coral reef tank that I had for 2 years and worked on for 15hours a week during that time fell into neglect and everything died. I stopped working out and running which I did everyday for the previous two years. my place started getting dirty (I always have been a very tidy person) and I didn't even notice. Most importantly, I stopped careing about my studies, which I used to have an intense interest in (I wanted to go to grad school but not at this rate).

It's scary to see what has happened to me and my life because of something which people would laugh at you for saying that you are addicted to but it has. I really started thinking about just getting rid of my PS3 and Xbox for the first time today but I REALLY dont wnat to...

Silvertabby
Silvertabby's picture
Offline
Last seen: 1 week 2 days ago
OLGA memberOLGA moderator
Joined: 11/23/2010 - 4:42pm
Hi tcbarr and welcome to

Hi tcbarr and welcome to Olga. It looks like you've come to the realization of the devastating effects that gaming is having on your life. That's the first step in finding recovery. The next step is a big one. You have to quit and the best way is cold turkey. I would encourage you spend some time reading posts. If you decide you are ready to quit gaming, you could box up all your gaming equipment and take it somewhere else, preferably a little ways away, so it's out of your site, until you are ready to get rid of it once and for all.

All of us here understand what you're going through, as we've been through a similar experience. We support and encourage each other through these forums and also in chat or Skype meetings. If you can attend meetings, you may find it very helpful. Quitting isn't easy, but if you want to enjoy your real life instead of a fantasy life, it's your only option. Good luck to you.

 

Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending. ~Maria Robinson

Steele
Steele's picture
Offline
Last seen: 5 months 4 weeks ago
OLGA memberOLGA moderator
Joined: 12/14/2010 - 1:31pm
I think the same as

I think the same as Silvertabby, cold turkey is the best way.

Now I have my computer stored at work, as an attempt to get gaming out of my life. It seems to work well. When I have my computer at home it just too easy for me to jump in. Maybe in time I will move it back home, but for now, it is the best option.

Ofcourse I have a lot of excuses for moving my computer back home, such as "it is my connection to the outside world", "I need it for work", "I use it to watch movies", "I use it to talk to my family". But the truth is, 99% of the time I use it for games.

Sounds like you really had a good thing going, with workouts and the cool coral reef tank. How about trying to re-connect to some of your friends? Doing stuff, being with other people, and if possible, talking about what you are going through, can really help a lot.

"I want to see people and I want to see life."

Andrew_Doan
Andrew_Doan's picture
Offline
Last seen: 2 weeks 2 days ago
OLG-Anon memberOLGA memberOutreach
Joined: 06/13/2011 - 9:37am
I spoke to Hilarie Cash, PhD

I spoke to Hilarie Cash, PhD last week. She runs an Internet and video game rehab center near Seattle. Video game addiction is an epidemic, and she thinks the rate of addiction is nearly one in five college students. There is a TED talk, "Demise of guys", that addresses video game addiction in guys.

You're not alone. This is an extremely insidious and destructive addiction. I used to maintain a coral tank too. When I played WOW, it fell into neglect and I lost over a thousand dollars. I ended up selling the tank.

I recommend that you approach the steps, seek face to face meeting, and establish accountability partners.

Thanks for sharing.

Andrew Doan MD PhD

My Videos: Internet gaming disorder is real & my story 

*The views expressed are of the author's and do not necessarily reflect the official policy of the U.S. Navy or Department of Defense.

LaurelS9
LaurelS9's picture
Offline
Last seen: 4 years 5 months ago
OLGA member
Joined: 11/29/2009 - 5:03pm
Agree totally with the above

Agree totally with the above suggestions. We can't do this alone but can do it together. A Power greater than ourselves is necessary...that is step 2. Cold turkey works for awhile but unless followed by a strenuous effort to improve out contact to God, and get into service work with others...You can do this, tcbarr

tcbarr
Offline
Last seen: 8 years 1 month ago
OLGA member
Joined: 10/05/2011 - 6:54pm
Thanks for responses

Thanks for responses everyone. I just became so fed up after yesterday that I left my house at night and suprised my girlfreind and stayed at her place. I am going to pack up all my games and take them to my girlfreinds today until I can sell them or give them to my brother/dad. It seems so weird but I feel REALLY bad leaving al this behind. I play competitive CoD and have a team that plays in tournamnets and such (have a lot of time invested in my useless skills), sounds really silly when I write it out but I feel worse about abondoning these fake comittments than skipping my classes and such!

I have had a long history of substance abbuse in my life and I know that I cant moderate my usage to even the sliightest. However, the addict in me keeps telling me that I can just play on weekends and stuff of that nature but lukily I know better!

After I write this I am going to go the gym and then go to work and do some experiments that I have been putting off for literally 3-4 months becuase as soon as I do the bare minumum at work, I am out of there to go play video games.

I feel confident that I will follow through on getting my games out of the house today as I have mixed feelings but the on that I am encountering in the most abundance is one of happiness, to finally be able to come home to a clean house and real hobbies, and most imortantly to not have crazy excusses to disregard my studies.

tcbarr
Offline
Last seen: 8 years 1 month ago
OLGA member
Joined: 10/05/2011 - 6:54pm
Steele wrote: Sounds like
Steele wrote:

Sounds like you really had a good thing going, with workouts and the cool coral reef tank. How about trying to re-connect to some of your friends? Doing stuff, being with other people, and if possible, talking about what you are going through, can really help a lot.

THis is good advise, unfurtunatly, I have always been a very reclusive person and don't really have any freinds. I plan on spending much more time with my family which I am very close to and live within 20m of. I think that my job, working in the lab at IU, is the extent to my social life and I do plan on starting to get back to all the experiments that I abandoned several months ago and socializing with the other researchers...

ElizabethA
ElizabethA's picture
Offline
Last seen: 6 years 2 months ago
OLGA member
Joined: 04/02/2011 - 5:40pm
TCBarr...I was glad to hear

TCBarr...I was glad to hear that exercise is on your todo list. Good you are getting rid of the "dope" in your house--you have had to get straight before, and this is absolutely the same. You aren't going to leave your works around the house, and you shouldn't leave that xbox either. Get it gone!

Come back to OLGA often. There is good support here and peeps who really "get it".

Best,

ElizA

.Left the games behind Tuesday, March 28, 2011...I have a new left knee and a lot more appreciation for the word "recovery"....blessings come in the darndest forms!

.

Patria
Patria's picture
Offline
Last seen: 1 year 2 months ago
OLGA member
Joined: 06/02/2011 - 1:55am
Quote: I play competitive
Quote:

I play competitive CoD and have a team that plays in tournamnets and such (have a lot of time invested in my useless skills), sounds really silly when I write it out but I feel worse about abondoning these fake comittments than skipping my classes and such!

I was very competitive. But after 3 months of not playing my main game, I lost that thought. I no longer cared about the competitions. Right now I am busy enjoying real life; which is much more interesting than games.

I'm not kidding about that. I spent 8 years competing, and no one could have told me that I wouldn't miss it. I did miss it for awhile--and I expected to feel that way--but those feelings are gone. The best part about quitting cold turkey is the change in thinking.

Good luck!

Kate1song
Kate1song's picture
Offline
Last seen: 3 years 9 months ago
OLGA member
Joined: 10/15/2010 - 10:19am
tcbarr wrote: Steele
tcbarr wrote:
Steele wrote:

Sounds like you really had a good thing going, with workouts and the cool coral reef tank. How about trying to re-connect to some of your friends? Doing stuff, being with other people, and if possible, talking about what you are going through, can really help a lot.

THis is good advise, unfurtunatly, I have always been a very reclusive person and don't really have any freinds. I plan on spending much more time with my family which I am very close to and live within 20m of. I think that my job, working in the lab at IU, is the extent to my social life and I do plan on starting to get back to all the experiments that I abandoned several months ago and socializing with the other researchers...

When i quit.. i just did it.. I didn't dwell too much on it.. do what you need to do man to survive

The games are not worth it... you and your future are.

tcbarr
Offline
Last seen: 8 years 1 month ago
OLGA member
Joined: 10/05/2011 - 6:54pm
I'm heading over to my place

I'm heading over to my place right after i write this to put ALL of my games in a box and take them to my girlfreinds, I will sell them on craigslist afterwards. I'm definatly ready to quit, I'm just so fed up with how I sabatoged all my hard work and now it will take alot more work to get everything back on track but I am eager to begin!

You'll hear back from me!

Patria
Patria's picture
Offline
Last seen: 1 year 2 months ago
OLGA member
Joined: 06/02/2011 - 1:55am
Be good to yourself! you are

Be good to yourself! you are doing the right thing; now it's time to rest and enjoy real life.

Good luck!

Kate1song
Kate1song's picture
Offline
Last seen: 3 years 9 months ago
OLGA member
Joined: 10/15/2010 - 10:19am
tcbarr wrote:  It seems so
tcbarr wrote:

It seems so weird but I feel REALLY bad leaving al this behind. I play competitive CoD and have a team that plays in tournamnets and such (have a lot of time invested in my useless skills), sounds really silly when I write it out but I feel worse about abondoning these fake comittments than skipping my classes and such!

CoD is really hard to leave... So be ruthless about cutting ties... watch out for "well meaning" gamer friends who are ****ed you are leaving.. that stuff can really draw you back unexpectedly... Be ready for withdrawels.. they are totally part of the quitting..

You need a clean cut right now... Immerse yourself in anything that is not gaming related.. including avoiding gamer friends...

Serena
Serena's picture
Offline
Last seen: 6 years 9 months ago
OLGA member
Joined: 03/06/2010 - 2:40am
Yes, cut the cord.  Don't

Yes, cut the cord. Don't get immersed in coercive emails. Send a farewell one, if you like. Explain you have cut work and classes and spent too much time in the game. And that's it. Bye! If you're like the rest of us, playing a little CoD is like doing a little coke or heroin... no can do.

You have a girlfriend. You have family. I'm sure that you'll get lots of attention in your recovery. That's what your doing... going into recovery.

Try some exercising and things outside of your apartment. Don't mull around there. Plan activities that are with your family, girlfriend, all that academic catch up, and working at the lab. If that's not enough to keep you busy, try www.meetup.com or Habitat for Humanity, or Big Brother charitable organizations. You have too much good stuff to offer the world. Don't bury yourself in the game. If you need to zone out, read, watch a movie, or work out.

Selling the games is a good idea! Say bye forever to that b.s. waste of time!

Serena

"A person starts to live when he can live outside himself." Albert Einstein

"You don't get to choose how you are going to die. Or when.
You can only decide how you are going to live. Now." Joan Baez

Log in or register to post comments