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Last seen: 6 years 5 months ago
OLG-Anon memberOLGA member
Joined: 05/07/2013 - 10:28pm

Although I haven't touched an MMO or FPS for the past four months, I will say I have been playing Facebook games.. yes.. face palm. But will say my partner doesn't mind that at all so long as I'm keeping to my word limiting my time playing and the amount I'm playing also only to game with family and friends we both know and if I do add people to game with, I have to run the names past him.

Which I don't mind, he has been my biggest support system in helping me break my habit. And it has not been easy on him. I love and appreciate him for sticking with me throughout it all. He still game's but major difference between him and I, I got lost in the gaming world, and I'd been gaming a lot longer than he has. He knows his limits where as I did not have any.

Ok sorry from diverting from the path of what I wanted to ask. What triggers do you all have? I know for me there are certain songs, I listen to that I used to PVE or PVP with. I honestly enjoy listening to them It does bring up found memories of certain event's in certain game's and I do smile about it. Also I have looked up old YouTube clips of Raids, castle sieges and ganking parties I was involved in.

Reliving glory days on line, I feel guilty admitting that to be honest. I do get that itch to just go back into the games and check what's changed and who's on. But reality slaps me on the face. I'd be jeopardising my relationship over it. Something I'm not willing to do

Does make things hard when I know my little sister still games and talks to me about all the old players we both used to play with. I have taken to not engage in conversation with her concerning the game or any other. I do have days where I do ask about it. But then realise what I'm doing and change the topic of conversation.

What are some of your triggers? And how do you handle them?

" Life Begins Outside Your Comfort Zone"

Another Gamer
Last seen: 11 months 13 hours ago
OLGA member
Joined: 04/30/2010 - 9:19am
Biggest trigger for me is

Biggest trigger for me is when I am extremely unhappy with life. It doesn't matter what kind of game, so long as I can get lost in it and forget about the real world. I realize now that I may be an escapist when the going gets exceedingly rough. I was able to avoid playing games for over three years, but that was only because things in my life were somewhat stable. I don't seem to have the cravings for the game like an alchoholic might, but if things start going out of control in my life I find I will be highly tempted to return. I understand one of your triggers to "relive" glory days while gaming. I remember many times when I was extremely proud of myself and my pve (player vs environment) comrades for what we had achieved in-game. The feeling is amplified because it is shared with many people, a mass accomplishment. I think this is one of the hidden mechanics that designers employ to make the game more appealing, and I gotta say it does work. Party quests that are impossible without help, numerous different drop rewards from enemies that force you to trade with others to get something useful, pvp aspects that require immense amount of study in all classes and how to interact with them on the battlefield, these and more are all social mechanics that seem to endear people to keep playing, simply because the social aspect enhances the main game.

A single step is all it takes to begin a long journey...

Andrew_Doan's picture
Last seen: 3 weeks 2 days ago
OLG-Anon memberOLGA memberOutreach
Joined: 06/13/2011 - 9:37am
Trigger for me are

Trigger for me are screenshots and gameplay. As I travel deeper into recovery, triggers do little now.

Andrew Doan MD PhD

My Videos: Internet gaming disorder is real & my story 

*The views expressed are of the author's and do not necessarily reflect the official policy of the U.S. Navy or Department of Defense.

Last seen: 5 years 3 months ago
OLGA member
Joined: 12/11/2011 - 5:41pm
I tend toward black and

I tend toward black and white thinking often to my own detriment, but at other times that perspective's a life saver. It's been a year and four months - think recently I said five but recounted, it's actually four - I'm fussy about the truth :) - anyway, a good bit of time has passed. I have absolutely no interest in gaming. None. And I gamed heavily for 16 years.

Once I was fully aware that gaming was a lousy coping strategy, that it had robbed me of real life, I knew I did not want it anymore. And, like I said, I gamed for 16 years so I was extraordinarily slow to get a clue, all that time not giving any thought to the consequences of how I was spending so much of my time.

Now, it took a relatively short period of misery for me to understand the full extent of how much I did not want to game anymore. First, I started thinking I wanted to quit. Then, I realized my play was a compulsion because I was wanting to quit but I was continuing to play. That state lasted about a month I think, with the desire to quit growing rapidly, intensely.

On the Friday morning of December 9th, 2011, I woke up knowing I needed help and got busy finding it. By fortuitous events I was able to see a family friend who happens to be an addictions counselor that very afternoon. He told me to disconnect entirely from the game and never go back, to do *whatever it took* to not game. I made it a couple of weeks without logging back in. Then, tried to "manage my play" while attending 12 Step meetings until January 30th, wrestling big time with my "addict brain" lying to me all the while.

Now, this is the interesting part of my story - to me anyway - On the 28th of January I was mentally exhausted with this internal argument between my obsession to play and my desire to stop. That night I prayed a very earnest prayer that this argument be settled. The next morning I woke with 2 words on my mind - blessing and cursing. Okay, I grew up in the Church, I knew it was a reference to a Bible verse, but it meant little to me. I went on with my day, still struggling with the urge to return to the game.

Next morning I wake - "blessing and cursing" is the first conscious thought of that day. This time I go look it up: Deuteronomy 30:11-20 also known as "The Offer of Life or Death." Pretty **** cool. I can't explain it. Yes, I'm sure that passage was stored away deep in the recesses of my brain from my childhood instruction. That my brain could retrieve it now? Blows me away.

I read that passage, and the argument was over. I kid you not. I have had no intense urges or triggers since. All desire to game died that day. I don't feed or court gaming in any way whatsoever. I don't look at game websites or videos. I have no interest them.

Acceptance. When I am disturbed, it is because a person, place, thing, or situation is unacceptable to me. I find no serenity until I accept my life as being exactly the way it is meant to be. Nothing happens in God’s world by mistake.  Acknowledge the problem, but live the solution!

dan1's picture
Last seen: 4 years 9 months ago
OLGA member
Joined: 05/04/2012 - 6:42pm
My triggers for my online

My triggers for my online and single player games: Thinking about them. So really, anything that reminds me of them will do it (I am often triggered a bit when I respond to questions on OLGA). I'm sure that seeing screenshots would do it, but even thinking about them allows me to see many, many screenshots in my mind. If I allow myself to keep thinking about the, I start feeling that sweet puppy love, love, love that addicts feel for what we use. It hasn't yet pushed me into deep cravings but why go there? My main strategy is to change the subject in my mind. Time to think about something else.

The one place this topic change doesn't work quite as easily for me is with computer slot games. The instant I think about them I want to go play. I think these games were more like FPS games for me. I don't like to shoot at stuff so much and didn't play FPS, but pulling that slot handle over and over for hours gives me dopamine hits like nothing else and puts me in a very bad mental place. I didn't realize that these games were as bad as or worse than online games for me until I went once after I had several months sober from online stuff. I recognized that mental state as an intense version of what I experienced with other games.

So yeah, the trigger is the thought. The strategy is to change the topic. And if a craving hits, I just keep saying to myself, "I don't have to go do that today. I don't have to. Some other time, maybe, but not today. And as I deal with my underlying issues, the pain and anxiety and agitation that I feel, I feel like I "need" that fix less and less. But it's there, and maybe always will be.

Oh and @ gettingalife: I googled it, and yes, it's pretty clear. No wonder you came to OLGA and worked your steps. I sometimes have had a thought like that; it's always just a feeling or a few words or a sentence or something. But it is important. I think it's our inmost selves, yelling as loudly as it can to, in the only way it can. The part of our brain that thinks deeply and rarely speaks. And that as I've learned in going through life, I ignore that voice at my peril.

I am a recovering computer game and gambling addict. My recovery birthday: On May 6, 2012 I quit games and began working a program of recovery through OLGA No computer games or slot games for me since December 12, 2012. No solitaire games with real cards since June 2013.

Last seen: 4 years 6 months ago
OLGA member
Joined: 11/03/2012 - 11:28pm
I have a facebook page

I have a facebook page called Calm Relax....and on that page I use posts of beautiful places and scenes. Some of the images I come across really remind me of SL. Like I went to places that look familiar in SL that look like the images. I am able to pull through those triggers. But it does bring up a longing to want to be inworld again. Because the visual inworld is like being places when you can't really afford or health wise visit them in real life.

So, I enjoy the posts I post on my page. Even tho that trigger is there. I love looking at the visuals because for me the pictures pulls you into them and you can imagine yourself there. And like you I also have songs that trigger me wanting to be inworld. but almost 7 months of not being there, I am finding I am able to pass over the trigger and actually enjoy the song.

It gets easier :) I am so happy to report that. But like many here, I have my good days and bad. The key is to get past it. :D

Second Life escapee as of Oct 26, 2012 (feel free to Private Message me, I will always return a response) ~Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment~. Buddha Abandon-HOLD ON!

xxBIBxx's picture
Last seen: 1 year 7 months ago
OLGA member
Joined: 12/05/2017 - 12:54pm
My triggers

I'm posting here even if I see it's been uneventful for a while.

My triggers and biggest one is boredom. Another is curiosity. I also feel like I'm missing out on something; pretty much I'm talking about what's happening on IMVU. I get bored with what the husband is watching on TV or I just want to pop on to see what's going on in a particular chat room. Who's in there etc. I also get in this state of mind..oh he's online let's see what happens there with him. I also get curious if I see someone has pro-card that says single or has an avi pic where they are pictured alone. I have to go look and see what's going on with them. I have made it my business to butt in and look and then possibly send a message to them and say something sympathetic or comforting. Sometimes I say something that is condescending and it comes out in a bad way...not good. I'm working very hard though lately to just "mind my business".

IMVU; my vice, my addiction.

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