Addicted to strong narratives and stories

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E5oteric
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Addicted to strong narratives and stories

Hi everyone

 

My particular problem seems a little different from everyone else but I’m hoping that some people on here have some similarities and can help.

I was never hooked onto games like MMORPGs or even gaming with my friends, instead I preferred to dive into strong narrative games, adventure games and RPGs at first, my worst addictions or most beloved games would be those in the Dark Souls series recently, the last game I bought was Persona 5 which is incredibly narrative, however I dislike online only play.

 

I recently quit again I think it’s been more than 5 times total so far and I’ve not gamed or watched any gaming videos for more than 10 days, after all the withdrawal I began watching some shows on Amazon since I had more time, the trouble is I just binged this morning and stayed in bed and had the same suicidal feelings and thoughts as before, I feel unhinged and drained.

 

I also know for a fact that if I quit the TV shows the next problem will be fiction books which I can pretty much binge read also. So its gaming, TV and books that I can’t read.

 

So the problem to me seems almost too large.

 

It gets stranger when I think about the games that other people find addictive are the same ones that I can play without playing to excess. I would probably get bored way to quickly of most MMORPGs and usually after the initial binge I simply stop playing.

When it comes to competitive games online such as shooters I can probably control my urges to play for too long.

 

There are definitely TV shows, books and games that I can pick up and put down but there are also ones that I can’t, strong narrative seems to be the key.

 

Does anyone else out the associate with this and what did you do in the end?

wazzapp
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Are you considering suicide?? Please SEEK HELP:

http://www.olganon.org/forum/i-need-help-gamers-open-forum/are-you-considering-suicide

Never alone, go to meetings <3 Mumble voice meetings on cgaa are great, see you there <3

 

Polga
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Welcome Chris

Welcome Chris

It's good that you recognise where your problem area of addiction is. Many of our members  may have  their activity that is particularly addictive. Others chose to stay away from everything that remotely resembles a game. You have to do what you have to do. No one person's addiction experience is the same as another's

At the end of the day, it's all addiction which means that it all relates, and if it's making your life unbalanced the answer is to try to abstain from the behaviour and find new healthy outlets for you spare time. You may need support such as a 12 step group to help you do this, or from a therapist or by yourself. Some people use face to face meetings of AA or NA; and find a welcome there. There are online meetings for gamers you can attend. See the meetings tab above

All the best to you.

INFO

Parent's online meeting THURSDAY 9pmEST/EDT click here

Online meetings gaming addicts click here

Spouses/SO's of addicts click here

Parents of addicts click here for advice

Help for video game addicts click here

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Steele
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Hi there

Hi Christopher

I was (am) addicted to playing turn based strategy games. I tried online gaming, but it was never my thing and not that addictive to me. I wanted to play alone, not be bothered, no time pressure, and get my perfect game. I would say that I wanted to create my perfect story, since I re-started and re-started endlessly to get that perfect game. Grinding and grinding, and never getting that game that would be perfect.

I can also binge series, books to a lesser degree also, but I always can stop it. I can use these to escape responsabilities too, but it is much less obsessively than with games. Strategy games just take me over, I get obsessed, think about doing nothing else, dont sleep, dont eat, everything else is secondary. 

I do not know what it is about strategy games that gets me hooked, and I do not care so much about understanding anymore really. It is bad for me, and that is why I must avoid it. It makes me unhappy, I am much better without it. Much better. It drained me of motivation, it blinded me from things I really like and care about, it made me feel trapped, it made me feel alone. Really horrible and dark.

But I also got a lot of motivation and feeling of purpose back once I started working on stopping. Still discovering, it is an adventure of its own :-). But now I cannot re-start and it is far from perfect, and I have to find peace with that. I think that much of my real problem revolves around this. 

Sounds like you have a similar issue but with other type of games, and it is also very likely that for you there are reasons behind it. I really think that addiction is a sympthom of something else that is going haywire, something being blocked. I could only start finding those reasons once the all-consuming gaming was out of the way, and I started looking at my real life. And I am still learning, discovering and finding.

If you need help with stopping, I would suggest going to NA meetings. Narcotics Anonymous has quite some meetings in many places, and in my experience they are quite willing to accept other types of addictions among them. Really addiction is a sympthom, and I found that what they shared was very much the same as what I experienced. What you can also do is read "the big book" from alcoholics anonymous (link below). I was very much surprised by the stories in that book, because I recognized so much of it. 

http://www.aa.org/pages/en_US/alcoholics-anonymous

Big part of what keeps addiction going is shame, feeling helpless, worthless. That is not you. That is addiction. There is a nice TED talk about shame from Brene Brown, maybe you will like it too. It helped me a lot.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=psN1DORYYV0

https://www.ted.com/talks/brene_brown_on_vulnerability

Welcome to Olga. Also know that there is another online community (cgaa.info). They do not have an active forum, but do have regular online meetings. Maybe that can help you too.

"I want to see people and I want to see life."

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