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Last seen: 1 year 11 months ago
OLGA member
Joined: 03/26/2014 - 6:17pm

Waw its been since july 2013 that i decided that i am an adict and I quit playing. Hard work and a few relapses, but i managed. I am now clean for 1038 days. Yes when i feel the urge to revisit the past i want to play again and usually i have my set of rules to make sure i don't : go for a walk, call a friend, go out, ... In other words occupy myself. Urgh all this usually works but now i feel utterly alone in this again. I never told anyone about this except my therapist. Whome i quit visiting because i had in my opinion everything under control. I don't want this anymore, im so ashamed that i still want to do this. I really could cry. It almost destroyed my life. I feel as i am in crisis right now. Not after all this time. Because i know when i start again i wont be able to quit again. I need help. I am struggeling. Fighting. 

Polga's picture
Last seen: 8 hours 6 sec ago
AdministratorOLG-Anon memberOLGA member
Joined: 02/17/2014 - 11:33am
Welcome Lana

Welcome Lana

I'm glad you are here and thanks for sharing

Listening in to online voice meetings with other gaming addicts may help you.

They happen daily.

There is more info here about what this site can do for you

We also have a hotline number which you can try

(612) 245-1115

Please reach out to others for help.


Parent's online meeting THURSDAY 9pmEST/EDT click here

Online meetings gaming addicts click here

Spouses/SO's of addicts click here

Parents of addicts click here for advice

Help for video game addicts click here

Please help! Donate here

Silvertabby's picture
Last seen: 2 weeks 3 days ago
OLGA memberOLGA moderator
Joined: 11/23/2010 - 4:42pm
Hi Lana.  I know how you're

Hi Lana.  I know how you're feeling.  I can go along for a long time just enjoying my life and then suddenly I'm craving to game again.  I think to myself, "Where did that come from?".  But I know, it's the "addict brain".  Once we are addicted, it stays with us forever.  It may not be noticeable for awhile, but it's there and can raise it's ugly head anytime and anywhere.  What I find helps me is going to the meetings and talking to other gaming addicts.  It's much easier to deal with when we can talk about it with others.  


Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending. ~Maria Robinson

Steele's picture
Last seen: 6 months 6 days ago
OLGA memberOLGA moderator
Joined: 12/14/2010 - 1:31pm

That is a really impressive long time. Congratulations on that, that is great!

I have less days under my belt. About 280+ now. I am quite content with this, I have not been this long without gaming since... I dont know how long.

But I also feel a melancholic pull every now and then, especially when I am tired and grumpy. Like today, on a Monday for example.

The other day I read a post from a newcomer here. He wrote his first step. He wrote about powerlessness, and how out of control his life was / is. It brought me right back, to that horrible place. That helped cure my "desire" to game.

Also I try to keep reading, reading about other people's problems and issues, their emotions and troubles. It helps me to not feel so strange, alone, weird. We are all strange and weird, and that is ok.

Take care Lana. Hugs to you.

"I want to see people and I want to see life."

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