Since I have been prescribed Ritaline for ADHD since age 8, my social anxiety had gone worse and worse. When I was 12 my best friend who lived in my neigboorhood had to moove from the state. It's also at 12 that my older brother showed me the game WoW.
I still had friends here and there, but as I switched from a class to another, I lost all social bonds I had have for the last year. I got heavily into WoW during my school years. I got out of school with very few friends. As I wasn't going to highschool I was starting an apprenticeship, I lost even more everyday friends.
Finally I had a handfull of friends with who I would occasionaly do things but I had no such thing as a best mate, or being part of a group.
I finally deleted all my characters on my account and stopped for about a months juste after finishing school.
But then I dscovered LoL. I started out finding it not very fun at all. But then when I started playing ranked, it compltly took hold of me. I have been fighting addiction on LoL for the last 3 years... I have unistalled and reinstalled, broke my screen, replaced my screen many times. But I always come back to it. Next to that I have bad anxiety caused by my ADHD medication, it doesn't help. Most of my friends are Marijuannah smokers, I used to be one myself but it only decuplated my anxiety. I feel empty....I feel like I'm nobody important. I try to look on life with an optimistical point of vue but it juste seems dull. during the last 2 years I have also been experimenting with many types of drugs, DXM, MDMA, Ecstacy, Heroine, Xanax, Cocaine and so on.
It's the same old thing everyday... I come back from work or school, I sit down on my chair or on my bed and I just feel empty...bored... Even playing LoL doesn't make me feel much better, it just makes me feel guilty and I don't even ave fun with the game anymore, I just waste my time on it.
Even trying all these different types of drug, my only addiction remains to video games. I don't know what to do...
I have my final exams in about a month I've already unplugged unistalled and reinstalled it all again a week after twice already. I don't know what to do to stop me from getting back to it.
I might even fail my 3 years of studies if I let it get hold of me in the next months.
What can I do to stop it ! once and for all !?