Not feeling very well...

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Squire
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Last seen: 3 years 11 months ago
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Joined: 11/29/2015 - 6:58am
Not feeling very well...

Hi, after finding out about this community I decided I would give it a try so here I go, I hope I don´t sound to depressive even though I am.

I am a guy in his late teens who has come to the conclusion that I have huge problems concerning video games. So much that I used to play them alot, and I mean quite alot. The thing was I realised that I had a problem for something like a year ago so I tried quitting the games. What made my life worse though was that I got into a depression at the same time. My depression got worse over time and it got so bad after awhile that I dropped out of school temporary. I think my depression was a result of my gaming habits for the most part.

However my time out of school made me pick up video games again. I started to play just so I could get my mind of my depression. It seemed harmless at first but I ended up getting even more depressed and very addicted to games. All I did for a couple of months was mostly playing games, it got so bad that I lost the grasp on my life. Lets fast forward time to the present. Video games made me almost fail my education, It made me give up on life cause I could´nt force myself to quit, I am still getting depressed from time to time, I have wasted countless hours upon something that I didn´t really want to do.

Nowdays I am doing what I can in order to make something out of myself. It is really all I can do. I am still in school improving even though my grades failed miserably because of the games. I have improved my life conciderably over the last months. I am training, eating healthy, I have daily routines, I even have new hobbies. Also I have friends, very good friends which is mainly the reason I haven´t given up. But I can still not get over the fact that I feel like a worthless human being at times. I feel like if had only done differently I could have been something else, someone with a more fullfilling life. I am constantly having thoughts that my future isn´t looking well but I still have a slight hope for myself, that I one day will think of all this as just a bad dream. I can also state that I am off video games at the moment (And I have been off for the last couple of weeks) I can´t think of an excuse to start gaming again.

Feels really good that I could write my story herem I don´t now what I am aiming for by writing it here. It feels good however, like a stone lifted from my chest.

Polga
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Joined: 02/17/2014 - 11:33am
A warm welcome Squire and

A warm welcome Squire and thanks for your experience.

If it helps; I think you are on the right path, staying game free. By taking positive sustained change with small habits we eventually end up in a much better place. So you not gaming will have huge benefits I'm sure.

I can relate to not feeling good about things and choices I have made in the past. But on the other hand there were times when I made good choices that lead me to be thankful today. Life is a mystery after all.

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Squire
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Last seen: 3 years 11 months ago
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Joined: 11/29/2015 - 6:58am
Thank you so much for your

Thank you so much for your reply and kind words! 

I want to believe that things will turn out better and hearing that their is more people who have had similiar problems helps somehow. I don't know how I shall progress from where I am now but I guess I will just have to find a way.

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