I thought I was the only one with this problem. My 13-year-old son is addicted to Halo 2 and is completely out of control! Although he has been playing for a while, I just realized about 2 months ago that he has a problem. He started to tell lies so that he could get more play time. I was limiting play time so he would go over a friends house and play, but say he was doing "homework". He ended up banned from the game for a month because of his deceit. Well, during that month, he would call a gamer friend that he met while playing on-line, who happens to live out of state. He would listen to this friend play and the friend would tell him who was on-line playing and what was going on. This was how my son was getting his high. Needless to say, I got the phone bill the other day. He spent 63 hours on the phone listening to other people play, all for one low price of $2,000.00. And now he doesn't understand why he can't play or use the phone. Afterall, he is going to pay me back over the next 10 years. When he can't play, he tries to aggravate everyone in the house intentionally.
I am at the end of my rope. Does anyone have any suggestions?
I thought I was the only one
January 5, 2006 - 9:55am
#1
I thought I was the only one
I don't know the answer. This is the first time I have been to this site and I am awestruck. Perhaps by my own unawareness, and blatant stupidity. All I know is I want my son back. What should we do?
My son is now seeing a therapist and naturally, he is not happy about it. He is upset with me. I think that is mostly because he is not willing to admit that he has a problem. I just keep trying to remind myself that I am doing the right thing for him, as much as it hurts. I can't believe I have let it get this far. I never realized how out of control the situation really was. How do I convince myself that this situation does not mean that I am a bad parent?
No. You are a concerned parent.
Keep your concerns going! the "nagging" "b****ing" of my parents are the single biggest reason why I was not thrown out of college I believe. And I am really thankful for that, though it has taken some time to realize. They were one of the reasons I actually turned to playing (which was regrettable, but unavoidable, they were doing the best they could at that moment). But they were also the reason it did not wreck my life completely.
Besides, they have given me life and have given me my values and education, which I deeply cherish.
It _would_ be good to check out what underlying issues your sun has to dive so deep into gaming theugh. Maybe it is something at school, or something in your family. Put yourself in his place, talk with his teachers and friends (preferably without him knowing). Friends might be better approached through their parents. I do not think your son would understand you "snooping" on him, but sometimes it has to be done.
Love and Faith
Maxim
Not to sound like I'm blaming you or anything, but perhaps you did make a mistake or two? Not saying you did, and no doubt you've asked yourself that same question.
Are you in therapy with your son or is he going on his own?
Ron
"Get a Life!"
Ron Jaffe AKA Diggo McDiggity
OLGA Admin and Member since 2001
eMail: ronjaffe@cfl.rr.com
Co-Founder of OLGA and member since 2002
Thank you for the advice. You give me hope that someday my son will realize that it's because I love him that I do the things that I do.
Thanks again!
I definitely have made more than one or two mistakes. I am hoping it is not too late to right my wrongs. I don't blame him completely. It's not as if he lived on his own while this whole thing was going down. I was present the entire time, with blinders on.
I have gone to therapy with him, but he has also been on his own. I want him to be able to express himself without worrying about what I will say. And also, be able to discuss whatever problems he may be having with me without me feeling the need to defend myself. He needs to be able to be his own person.
Its not about blaming and its not about mistakes.
Everyone does the best he can, sometimes we dont know better and we do things which may hurt people in the short to medium run. I honestly believe that in the long run, very action we do and that is done to us has its useful effects.
Back on topic: I have had a father who was too busy feeding the family to care and a mother who was in a deep depression. This, after I had spent my childhood completely cared for constantly by different relatives. Things changed abruptly when I moved to Germany I guess. Such an abrupt change of "affection" can really mess u little children I guess. I do not blame them in any way (anymore) though. They did the best they could and we get along very well now.
Still, their actions or non actions have had effects on my life and continue to do so.