***Trigger warning - Suicide, anxiety, depression, swearing***
Our 25-year-old son has gaming and alcohol addiction. I believe this is self-medicating for his anxiety and depression. Is this the norm for other parents and their kids? I mean are other kids also self-medicating? I'm perplexed.
In January, he was suicidal because I was in the US (we live in Australia) his best mate picked him up from the hospital and looked after him until we could get home. His best mate then shot himself in February (none of us knew he had depression) we were and are all gutted.
Since February, we have tried repeated support options but were not detached. He has lost his job, his house, his girlfriend and his car - the first three due to gaming and drinking. He's also had a stint in court where he will be "locked up next time" according to the judge.
I have gone to Al-anon and I am learning to detach however, I'm struggling with feelings of abandonment. I want him to fall on the bones of his arse and find rock bottom before gaming, alcohol, depression and anxiety kill him. I don't want to abandon him though.
I called today and left a message which surprisingly he called me back. He's been ex-communicative since I called him on something he said was my fault that was actually his. All I could think to say to him was that I 'was thinking of him, hoped he was alright' and if he 'needed anything to let me know'. But that last part is bullsh**, if he needs anything and he can't do it for himself then he can ring me. But that's not what I said...
it all feels like I'm walking on eggshells and it continues to be exhausting. :(
Any help, feedback or support would be greatly appreciated.