I am a 15 year Veteran Gamer Widow.
As far back as in 1999- My husband developed video game Addictions. He started playing a Game called "Road Rash" on his Sega Genisis system during my pregnancy with our oldest son and then he moved up to PC games- Sony Playstation Games and so forth and so on.
I once had a two year streak where I temporarily managed to keep the gaming plug pulled on him- however- 2 years wothr of Withdrawls managed to get the better of him. He was verbally abusive towards me and my children, would throw tantrums over having to live up to his Fatherly duties with the kids and more.
Come December 17th of 2013- That changed- quick- fast- in a hurry and in HIS favor via Manipulation:
My husband managed to find a way to return to HIS gaming addiction by making good and sure that he usurped my efforts in trying to re-unite our family ( AKA- he was severely miffed that I password encoded my Desk Top PC so he could no longer game) and bought himself a Samsung Tablet and all on the same day that I went and got my cellular phone upgrade.
My Game addicted husband has not only returned to his Gaming Addiction, but he has also taken in 2 very specific Games:
A Facebook Game Called "Candy Crush" and another OLG Known as "Clash Of Clans".
My Husband's addiction of choice is that of "Clash Of Clans" or in Addict Speak: " C.O.C"
In carrying forward:
For about 13 of said 15 years now, I have long since stopped doing everything that had been expected of me by him (Servitude) aka- I stopped cooking his meals, I stopped doing his laundry, I stopped cleaning his messes and so forth and so on and I began to make it a point to virtually ignore his presence after he started exiling himself to another room so he could both game and sleep and then game before he goes to work.
My husband's Addiction, Attitude and his own form of Exile have ALL- become HIS own undoing and for reasoning that my children and I now live our lives for ourselves and carry on in our own daily hobbies, habbits and routines with out the Addict.
There is one draw back to following this path for ourselves though:
Another unknown trait that addicts carry (Mark and Note) is that Game Addicts start scapegoating Non Addicts when confronted with their Addictions and a good example of such would be this:
My kids like to play on the floor, watch their favorite shows on TV or in my 14 year old's case- Listen to music in his room, watch You Tube on his own tablet or other. When everyone- including my Game Addicted Husband goes to be bed- I stay up for a little while- take some Me Time and watch my favorite shows on TV until I tire.
My Game Addicted Husband believes he can use ALL of OUR hobbies and routines against us as a means of Justifying HIS Addiction and he does so by calling us names like "TV Addict" "Couch Potato Addict" "Don't Go Anywhere or Don't Do Anything Addict".
We just laugh at him every time he does and for reasoning that not only has HIS brain been "Hardwired" to HIS Clash Of Clans Game, but that he is seriously above and beyond having lost touch with Reality thanks to- the Clash Of Clans game.
So in turn:
I have a plan albeit's not a very pleasnt one: 4 years from now- my oldest son will be graduating High School and 12 years from now, my youngest will follow suit. When my youngest graduates and moves forward with his own life and both kids see a promising new world in Adulthood, I will have complete my mission as a mother and to boot- I too will be moving out and leaving my Game Addicted husband in hopes of making life better for myself and who knows- I may also find a better relationship with someone else and as long as said someone else doesn't have ANY addictions what so ever.
Not only have long since stopped supporting and serving my game addicted husband, but I have also come to the conclusion that Hard-Core- Willfull Game Worshippers like my husband are above and beyond help of any kind and from a not so pleasant point of view here- in dire need of just being hit below the belt with losing everything just as a would a drug addict, alcoholic or other addict does and will when people they've devalidated, disrespected and have just full on forsaken- up and leave their lives.
I've long since been done, I'm beyond tired and even though riding it out for 12 more years sounds ridiculous to some- I would rather not have to live in a run down women's shelter with 2 children nor would I wish any trama for my kids before they have a chance to finish their education and for forward with their own adult lives.
Been there and done that with own my parents and such is another story for another time.