I just joined up and thought I'd tell my story.
I note that most people have problems with WOW and as a result most literature on the subject is on people addicted to that game. My man, in contrast, plays Battlefield 2, but I think most of the same principles apply.
The whole thing is so pathetic. We met 3-4 years ago and now we have two kids. I am an academic woman in the middle of my carreer and he opted to stay home and look after the kids as the stay-home dad and homemaker. Wonderful! In that respect I feel truly priviliged. In other ways I don't.
I realized soon after we met that he had a problem with the game. (He'd stay up playing all night, refuse to go off-line when I came to visit, get very defensive when I suggested he'd have a break and have a coffee with me, that sort of thing, ad naseum). I stupidly thought that it'd pass and he always said that he'd just play for a bit, that he'd eventually fizzle out and get bored with it. I mean, the guy is 38 years old!
Of course he never got tired of it. I did though. He's tried to control his playing for my sake, and sometimes also for his own, when he thought himself that he played too much. The longest period we've had without the game was half a year, when he stopped after we went overseas. Eventually he'd start playing again though. We actually had internet cut off during that half year but then he thought we should at least have dial-up so we could email and do internet banking. So we got dial-up. And he quickly discovered that it was entirely possible to play Battlefield on dial-up. Don't ask me how he did it - as far as I know it shouldn't be possible.
In short, I am thinking about packing my bags. And my kids' bags. If we didn't have kids I'd be out the door already. What's stopping me is mainly that I'm not sure if ending the relationship would be the best thing to do for my kids or myself. Without him, the kids would have to go to daycare and I'd have to cut back on my working time.
Right now I am just trying to learn more about this type of behaviour. It's obviously no use trying to talk to the guy, or get him to seek help. He won't do it. And he won't talk to me either. He'll just say, 'Well, I don't have anything to say to you anyway' and click YES to another round of Battlefield. It's obvious to me that he is not well and I am sort of at the acceptance stage here. I can't change him but I can change my reactions. I don't THINK that I am enabling him; I don't bring him food by the computer or do all the housework or anything. But of course I feel rejected and am kicking myself that I got stuck in this mess with a man who actually said as much as it being a waste of time to spend an evening with me when he could be playing Battlefield.
I realize I am not the only gaming widow out there and I am glad I found this place. I could use some support and I would be very happy if you guys could recommend some books or similar that could help me understand, both him and my options here.