Me and my wife of 22 years (been married actually 5) have recently separated. It seems like we had just gotten sick of looking at each other.
We have had marital problems for a long time before the separation. My wife has been ill for the last 4 years, and unable to work, last year we were in a automobile accident, and because of her back it became very hard for her to get out much. We also went down to a 1 car household, and with me working a full time job in another city, she basically had become a shut in.
I still want to work things out with my wife, and she is currently staying at her folks house about 125 miles away. But what I noticed was my wife was acting rather odd, stopping our calls and conversations abruptly. Something seemed wrong, so I checked our phone logs. This is where the gaming issue comes in.
Me and my wife had been online gaming for years, but I stopped playing about a 6 months ago, and I had thought she had stopped with me. We had made a deal years ago that if we played MMO's, we would play together. Anyway, the call logs revealed that she had been calling this # like 5 to 15 times a day, even on our vacation! While I didn't recognize the # I did recognize the location. It was one of the people we had gamed with before, and it was a guy. Nobody has had contact with this guy because he was so addicted to wow, he plays 18 to 20 hours a day. One of my friends mentioned that this guy has several small kids, is single, and allows the kids to fall asleep wherever they fall even at 1am in the morning because of WoW.
I confronted my wife about this, told her I know she has still been playing wow and knew who she was playing with. I had questioned her before in the past but she would never tell me she was playing WoW, this time she did. She explained to me that when the rest of us left, it in essence had took her away from her friends, so she had been playing behind my back.
Now looking at the situation I could definitely see her point, so I really had no problem with that. The guy she was hanging out with did bother me, so I asked that she please stop playing for a week or 2 while we tried to work thru our issues, and she agreed.
She didn't. Being familiar with the game, still having my old account, and the use of the wow site, I was able to confirm that she was still playing. I was upset, confronted her, and had a huge blowup. Anyways I calmed down and she has been playing wow with me knowing. Problem is how much she is playing wow. The last 3 nights she has been getting on at about 7pm and staying logged in until approx 4am, and every single time the guy I mentioned has been logged in playing with her. When I call to talk I know she is sitting there playing, the calls have gotten longer, but sadly all she seems to want to talk about is wow.
I have told her that I believe she may have a problem with the game, but she either blows it off, or has some excuse like oh I sit there most of the time afk etc.
I love my wife with all my heart, and I really want to work this out, but I don't see how we can start to work on our issues and reconnect when we have this to deal with.