Long story short... I'm a woman in my mid-20's and I recently became separated after a one-year marriage. Recently through conversations with my ex (which we have occasionally mostly about the divorce proceedings) I've found out that has dropped out of college, he has become unable to hold a job, he is on anti-depressants, and he is suffering from anxiety disorder and panic attacks that have deemed him unable to leave his house. Moreover, I have also come to find out he is spending hundreds of dollars and dozens of hours playing MMORPGs.
Before I left him, when we started having marital problems he was gaming between 6 and 12 hours a day. I'm not sure if the gaming led to the problems, or the marital problems led to the gaming. All I know is that I'm pretty sure the situation must have gotten much worse after I left. I also know that he had dealt with an addiction to another computer game before we met.
Recently, after checking some of the finances, I found out that he is spending hundreds of dollars weekly on the same online game. I called him up and plainly asked him if the gaming had gotten worse after my leaving. At first he tried to deny the extent of his gaming but when I told him I *knew* for sure because I had access to the financial records (through a paypal account) he admitted the gaming was indeed just as bad if not worse. However, when I confronted him he told me that this is no longer my concern, to "leave it alone" and that he is getting help from a therapist (and using medication) to deal with his current issues.
Right now I need help dealing with two issues. One is dealing with my own guilt because I feel that my leaving has triggered or exacerbated his depression and worsened his online gaming. I feel powerless because on the one hand although our marriage did not work out I still care for this person and wish him to be healthy and happy. The second is that although he says that he is seeing a therapist and is getting medication to deal with his depression, I am worried that neither his family nor his therapist know the real extent of his online gaming addiction.
My question is, should I butt out of this and trust that he is getting help or should I contact his family (whom I haven't spoken to since I left and probably think I'm the cause of all his problems) and inform them of the extent of his online gaming? He's in his 20's so he's not exactly a kid. Still, I'm not sure if anyone but me knows the extent of the gaming issue and the role it is playing in his recovery from depression.
Any advice would be appreciated.