This must be a common phenomenon but I'm not sure if it's been discussed already somewhere so I thought I'd raise the issue.
Well, I obviously joined up here because someone I care about is adicted. Or so I think. And my main goal is of course that he should stop playing since it is hurting our relationship - badly.
It's just that somehow it's so much easier when he's playing full-on-as-much-as-possible, like he has done before. Not because I like it (I hate it!) but because then I am at least sure what's going on. It's easy: he plays like CRAZY, is completely rude to me when I interrupt and I am convinced that this is not normal.
The trouble is that he's a bit of a binger. He does stop from time to time, usually after we had a big discussion about it and I manage to make him understand how bad I feel about things. So first all is well. He doesn't play at all, for days or weeks. Then one day he causally mentions that he'll 'just have quick flutter at the computer' and my alarm bells ring. At the same time I feel stupid and guilty for being so controlling (although I don;'t actually say anything or sulk about it). He's just playing for 1 hour or so, I like my independence and surely this doesn't have to spin out of control. But it does. Little by little, it ALWYAS ends in disaster where I really have no contact with him at all for days. And then I know. Again. Misery but at the same time there is no doubt in my mind what this is all about.
But the part leading up to the messy end is such a weird gray zone and I keep questioning myself. Is it him being addicted or is it me being controlling?
And today is such a day where I just don't know. I even feel like I was an idiot for joining up here. I guess I swing from denial to clarity just as much as my (probably) addicted man.
Any thoughts on this?