I just wanted to start a thread offering support to anyone who is currently dealing with being in a relationship with an addicted gamer.
First off I would like to begin by telling a little bit about my story. About 3 years ago, I was 5 years into my marriage, 8.5 years into my relationship with my now ex-husband. I gave up a lot to be with him. I gave up my home and being near my family and friends to go live with him, gave up my job when I moved and had to re-organize all my schooling in order to be able to complete it long distance.
My husband always enjoyed gaming, however up until this point it was a healthy hobby that he did not spend excessive amounts of time on. I started to notice him losing interest in real life activities such as going out for dinners, socializing with friends even watching television with me. My husband was spending all his time online playing Final Fantasy. He was losing sleep, no longer coming to bed until an hour or two prior to getting up for work, becoming irritable and appeared to be losing himself in this virtual world. It even got to the point where he became frustrated with himself implementing a night time "cut off time" where he would stop playing no matter what and go to bed. However, he could not even adhere to this self-made rule.
I began to notice he was treating his online friends more like his real friends and falling farther away from his real friends and family and of course away from me. I found out a short time after that he had started a "relationship" with another online gamer. But it was far worse than an online crush which would have been bad enough, however my husband decided to fly out to meet this individual and this began their real life relationship and the end of my marriage. I tried to offer him opportunities to work on our relationship which he declined to acknowledge was an issue because he "was trying to work on his feelings to see where he stands" and I was supposed to just blindly be supportive of his affair. Allow him to have how cake and eat it too. A year after I discovered the affair and he and she had had more visits between them I chose to file for divorce, pick up and leave everything once again and return home to my family and friends where I belong.
I am happy to report that now 3 years later, although the struggle was long and exhausting I am finally fully independent and back on my feet. I have a full-time job and purchased my first home all by myself. I am a more confident woman than I have ever been and am living proof that there is life after gaming. You just have to put in hard work and a lot of patience. I would like to offer my support to any and all who are still trapped in this type of situation or who are just coming out of it. I discovered this website when I was at a low point in my life feeling rejected and not good enough. Now on the other side, a bright, independent young woman I am here to offer strength and inspiration to all.