&: Progress Reports? Small Steps for anyone?

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els918
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&: Progress Reports? Small Steps for anyone?

Seems like we only hear about the bad stuff going on in our lives in these posts. Has anyone seen any progress that they would like to share? Either progress in the addict or progress in how you are dealing with it yourself?

My husband is at least aware of his problem but he is still too sensitive about it to have a conversation with. But he knows when he is doing something that hurts us as a family (playing instead of being with us), and has taken more time to stop and spend time with our son, leaving more game time for after our son goes to bed.

He is also seeing the affects of his gaming in his weight gain, and is trying get in a little physical activity, like taking our son around the neighborhood in his new wagon. And hey, that's a little less time on the game!

Don't get me wrong, I am still dealing with his whole gaming addict problem- he doesn't get enough sleep, I'm often ignored, work and household chores aren't a priority to him, etc. BUT there are a few bright spots that might help him overall if I encourage him in them, so that's what this post is about. Anyone else?

Edited by: lizwool at: 12/6/06 8:08

Diggo McDiggity
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Re: Progress Reports? Small Steps for anyone?

Hi Erica,
We have a Progress Report thread below where folks are encouraged to share the real life progress they've made, whether it relates to gaming stuff or not. Feel free to check it out.

p198.ezboard.com/folgafrm...ID=1.topic

Ron

"Get a Life!"
Ron Jaffe AKA Diggo McDiggity
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eMail: ronjaffe@cfl.rr.com

Co-Founder of OLGA and member since 2002

els918
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Re: Progress Reports? Small Steps for anyone?

Thanks. I just read those posts and they are great.

I guess what I am getting at, and maybe it should still be addressed over there, is regarding those who are living with the gamer. So often we are focusing on all the bad stuff the gamer is doing, but if we took a minute to notice some of the small positive steps that the person is making and acknowledge them, we would probably be less angry and resentful. I just wanted to give the "friends and family" an opportunity to acknowledge something positive going on with their gamer.

It's fine if we need to move this post. Thanks again!

Diggo McDiggity
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Re: Progress Reports? Small Steps for anyone?

I've made this post a 'sticky' post - Friends and family folk, please use this thread to post your progress. Remember any small step in the right direction is a big step, really. And others who are walking in your shoes right now can use the encouragement.
So what progress have you made today?

"Get a Life!"
Ron Jaffe AKA Diggo McDiggity
OLGA Admin and Member since 2001
eMail: ronjaffe@cfl.rr.com

Co-Founder of OLGA and member since 2002

els918
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Re: Progress Reports? Small Steps for anyone?

I find it interesting that the area of "progrees" is often like a swinging pendelum.

If he does spend more time away from the game and with family, we have a great time, but only to find that he makes up for that lost game time in the next hours or days, like a binge or something. Then we are left alone without him again, for long periods of time.

So although I appreciate every second he spends with us, I know that I need to be prepared for what will come next, which is that he is about to disappear into WoW.

Has anyone else noticed a similar situation? I have and I know that just by recognizing the trend has helped me to deal with it and not be so angry when it happens. I can predict it and don't need to take offense. I just know what to expect and can get on with my life.

lovnhi4evr
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Re: Progress Reports? Small Steps for anyone?

Hello,

I wanted to reply to your last post. I know exactly how you feel. I do appreciate the times my boyfriend spends away from WoW, but I do notice that it seems like he thinks the game time is now "owed" to him. Like he has met the quota time spent with me and he is now due his game-playing time. I brought this up to him the other day, and he said its not like that. Well, on his RARE day off from work he chose to spend all afternoon playing and then continue playing into the evening because "there wasnt anything else planned". Well, why default to the game? Why not just sit and watch TV with me? Because you spent all day with me yesterday? Is that too much for you? Why not instead of defaulting to the game when there isnt anything to do, you try thinking in terms of US, or you just be happy spending time with me? But maybe these types of conversations are starting to get to him...we are going camping this weekend. Small steps are good steps!

Spot099
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Re: Progress Reports? Small Steps for anyone?

After doing everything wrong in regards to dealing with an addicted gamer, the threat of serious separation woke my boyfriend of 6 years out of his addiction.

He has since curbed his playing but on occasion overstep the bounds that we both agreed upon. So as long as I keep a close watch he plays about 3 - 4 nights a week instead of 'every waking moment'.

I don't enjoy having to 'watch this boundary' it is annoying, but it was definetly better than before.

I also found out that he actually ENJOYS playing WOW with me. I had always thought he just wanted me to play so he could shut me up and play some more, but we have been trading up - he gives me quality time doing what I like, which is talking to him about life and stuff. And in return I play a little WOW with him.

So far it's worked out okay. I let you guys know...

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