Hello, I'm trying to decide if my husband is addicted or if he just doesn't want anything to do with me and our girls. I used to try to get him to spend time with us, we have been to marriage counselling, nothing works. I finally just let go and let him do what he wants. I realized I can't control him. Here's his typical day. Wake up early, before the alarm clock, and start checking the sports or games sites on computer. As soon as he feels it's a 'reasonable' time, he starts playing the sports games. He usually wakes me up with the noise and light from the TV unless I wear ear plugs to bed. I get up and leave the room because I can't sleep with them on. After a few hours, I go back to use my bathroom and have to duck around him and his mess to get to the bathroom because he's standing as close as he possibly can to the TV. If he's not playing the sports games, he is watching ESPN, or some other sports related show.
The electronics stay on until I finally go to bed around 10 or 1030. I asked him to go to visit my family, he repsponded that he couldn't because he would miss a game or because he can't be close to people for that long without his "outlet". It's his way to calm down and stay calm, but he never leaves his bedroom unless it's to get something or unless it's too early for him to wake me with the TV. I started bringing him food because he refused to eat unless it was junk food he could keep in his room. Our daughters have asked why daddy loves the games and TV more than he loves his family, but I have no answer for them. When he does interact with us he is irritated, angry, usually yelling, and sometimes cussing at us, kids included. I've asked him why he doesn't at least come out and watch a movie with us, but he says it's because he's sparing us his anger. He can't watch TV with us because we can't keep completely quiet while he enjoys the show.
Once in a great while, he will go to the theater with us, enjoy a movie, and then go right back to his room and stay there for a few more months. He did have a job and went to college to get new degrees, but he spent all of his time otherwise in his room. No real contact with me or our girls. We will be moving soon, closer to my family, but I'm worried that it's just going to give my and our girls another reason not to bother with him anymore. I'm worried that it may be too late, but he refuses to accept that there is any problem at all. Is this an addiction, or is he just enjoying his single life while not having to be alone? Is it too late for our family?