Breaking Point

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Last seen: 3 years 2 months ago
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Joined: 07/14/2016 - 11:15pm
Breaking Point

I just joined this site in a desperate attempt to find some hope that this will not last forever. I am married to a gamer who is the love of my life but is causing me (and my 3 kids) incredible pain with this addiction, and I don't know how many more evenings I can spend in the same house with him but totally 100% alone. He has his game on his phone and tablet, so gets on the moment he wakes up and is plugged in for the rest of the day. He only puts it down if someone demands his attention, and even then it is clear we are frustrating him by interrupting. I cannot get any help or attention unless I specifically interrupt him, and it is impossible to communicate with him or expect any kind of help with our family because he is always too busy with the game. I am pregnant with our fourth baby, and I am terrified that this is never going to change. I am working so hard to do everything for our family and I am exhausted and depressed. It has only gotten worse and worse over the past couple of years, and it now literally consumes all of his time leaving nothing left for his family. I feel so alone.... 

Polga's picture
Last seen: 1 day 6 hours ago
AdministratorOLG-Anon memberOLGA member
Joined: 02/17/2014 - 11:33am
Welcome seeking_hope

Welcome seeking_hope

I am so sorry to hear you are so alone with this. Yu are certainly not alone in this situation in that many others share this kind of experience. I really feel for you with your young family to care for and the lack of support.

If you keep coming back to read up on the posts on the two spouse forums ( public and members only) starting with the info in the blue area at the top  you will learn a lot about taking care of yourself.

Firstly, you need to find new sources of support because you cannot run on empty for ever. Family, friends, make new friends, therapist, doctor, church, alanon, naranon.

Then you need to find out how you are enabling your husband to continue with his addiction and stop enabling. There are a couple of threads about enabling . Also learn about 'detaching with love' and boundaries.

I know you are hoping for a miracle .. sometimes they happen but he may need a wake up call to start to change and this may happen when you stop enabling and start to take care of yourself first. It is very unlikely that there can be any quick fix to him getting better. You can only control yourself, what you think and what you do.

Keep coming back here, Hugs to you xx


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