how do you know when your boyfriend is addicted to gaming?

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how do you know when your boyfriend is addicted to gaming?

Hi everybody! 

I need help. My boyfriend spends allmost all his time on the computer gaming with friends when they are online and alone when his friends are not online. He never seems to wanna do anything else. When I ask him if he wants to go for a walk or do an activity he doesn´t really want to, all he wants to do is sit on the computer. He says that it relaxes him, and that´s it´s his outlet for stress or a bad day at work. I kinda have to force him to spend real time with his friends and family. No one really knows about how much time he spends on his gaming, except from me. I have told him many times that he spends too much time on the computer and he just gets mad and tells me that I´m overreacting - that I just don´t understand gaming and that it´s just an activity like other sports. Sadly, I can´t remember the last time we went for a walk, just sad down with a glass of wine or went to the movie.. I´m so tired of making excuses for him. When i go out and my friends ask me where my boyfriend is I don´t know what to say. The truth is that he´s at home gaming. I can´t help thinking if this is how the rest of my life is going to be with him.. If we go to the summerhouse and he cant game, he will just watch online gaming on the computer. I can´t make him go for a weekend at the summerhouse without him bringing the computer. I cant escape the gaming.. I´m so fed up with this gaming. Honestly I think that he is addicted, and it´s so hard to deal with. If he had an alcohol problem and it had gone on for this long I would have left him. I can´t make him realize my frustration and I´m so tired of him just saying that I´m overreacting and him not reconizing my concerns and feelings. Honestly I feel that the only way to make him understand how big of a problem I think this is, is if I left. I dont want to leave, but I dont want to live like this either. It makes me feel sad, and I cant help looking at other couples when I´m out and wishing it was us. What do I do? What can I do? forgive my bad gramma english is not my native language. I so relieved that I found this outlet. I have been feeling so alone with this problem, and for some reason I always keep it to my self - I suppose because I know there is a problem, and if I talk about it it becomes real. :( 

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Last seen: 12 hours 22 min ago
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Joined: 02/17/2014 - 11:33am
Welcome Thora

Welcome Thora

Our welcome advice is here;

If his life is unbalanced because of gaming it suggests he is addicted.

There is an addiction questionaire here which also helps to diagnose addiction

As a 'rule of thumb' anyone who games more than 4 hours a day is likely to be an addict, but you can be an addict if you game less then that, because once you are addicted it is only a matter of time until gaming gets worse.

Keep coming back here to learn about how you can look after yourself. Read the posts of others. There is so much experience here.

This comment has links to other threads that will help you to get started.

You cannot control his addiction but you can look after your own life and make your choices.


Parent's online meeting THURSDAY 9pmEST/EDT click here

Online meetings gaming addicts click here

Spouses/SO's of addicts click here

Parents of addicts click here for advice

Help for video game addicts click here

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