At my witts end

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LonelyPartner
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At my witts end

Hello there lovely people

Well I have been reading here for a long time and thought about posting many times, Today is the day.

I have had enough, I am a 40 year old guy who has a male partner who is 26, we got on amazingly and he was great at the start of our relationship, after reading many many posts over and over about online gaming and addiction I worked thought sorting my own self out and this has been great actually as I am at a point where I dont care about staying in the realtionship anymore, this site has been amazing after many many hours of soul searching.

My partner is a 26 year old lad who now doesnt work and complains about health problems but can play LOL all day everyday, has the heating on at home all day but doesnt work to contribute a penny, he sits on his backside all day and plays computer games, we spend evenigns together but that is normally interupted by watching twitch or some super european league that is important.

Well after 18 months of this and feeling massivly taken advantage of its time to just get on with my own life and basically cut him out, the thought of living like this for another year or even six months is not an inviting thought, its sad to be honest how a grown man can have no ambition or drive to anythign other than play computer games, watch games, talk about games,

it has got to the point where I cannot bring myself to even tell family or friends what he is up too as its embaressing, its sad really as we should have just remained friends but we ended up together, its great really when you gain some focus and realise you deserve better and that you must not allow yourself to be treated this way.

I am all for each having their own hobbies but when you dont support the household its a waste of time and energy, I will be 50 in nine years and after my 41st birthday this weekend I thought to mysellf what are you actually doing wasting your time on this sad case.

Addiction is one thing but come on seriously playing games designed for teenagers as a adult and letting it take over your life, I would help him to the ends of the earth if he helped himself but my patience has worn thin and to be honest I am done, I feel trapped with him as he has nowhere else to go, doesnt share out realtionship with his family (homephobia) which I dont believe its just easier to hide in a game.

All in all this site has taught me to take care of me and be strong and not dependant on anyone, I have always been a strong minded caring empathetic person with great social circle, lockdown has taken its toll being a locked up extrovert and all.

Time to work out how to cut ties and move on, meet a guy who wants to spend time being a grown man and provide for our life, not live with what has become a burden and what has started to feel like being massivly taken advantage off

the old saying you dont know what you have until its gone is going to be my story for my soon to be Ex Parter.

I wish you all so well for putting up with what you do expecially where kids are envolved my only advice to all is fi they dont treat you right find someone who will, someone will enjoy spending time with you, make an effort, pay their way.

You shoudl never have to guess how someone feels.

Have a lovely day

Polga
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Joined: 02/17/2014 - 11:33am
Gaming addiction is

Gaming addiction is devastating. It grips people, especially those who need some kind of escape because of past hurts.

I hope you find the resources for spouses useful; see link below.

I'm glad you are now able to move on with your life because of your new awareness

It seems you hold much of the power in this relationship. With power comes some responsibility. I hope you can find a way to let him down respectfully.

INFO

Parent's online meeting THURSDAY 9pmEST/EDT click here

Online meetings gaming addicts click here

Spouses/SO's of addicts advice here

Parents of addicts click here for advice

Help for video game addicts click here

Please help! Donate here

LonelyPartner
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Last seen: 3 weeks 20 hours ago
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Joined: 11/06/2020 - 10:30am
Of course

Hi there

of course I will be respectful and calm, I should not be the one with power because things should be equal but being the sole provider makes you frustrated when even to this second he is sat playing a game.

anyway I am in a good place and will mind my own business and get on with my own stuff.

there is never a need to be nasty or blame, to be honest it's easier if you just worry about no.1

Polga
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Last seen: 14 hours 23 min ago
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Joined: 02/17/2014 - 11:33am
Yes I too found it really

Yes I too found it really frustrating and crazy making to be around someone whose life was so unbalanced by addiction and  discover we have no power over that addiction.

INFO

Parent's online meeting THURSDAY 9pmEST/EDT click here

Online meetings gaming addicts click here

Spouses/SO's of addicts advice here

Parents of addicts click here for advice

Help for video game addicts click here

Please help! Donate here

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