Relationship of 7 years over in the blink of an eye

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nyflgrl
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Relationship of 7 years over in the blink of an eye

I recently caught my fiancee of seven years cheating on me with a girl he met on Game of War. I had seen signs of cheating but did not think in a million years that he would resort to such behaviour. It was a month ago that I actually found proof of an online relationship with some girl from the game, he had sent her nudes that automatically sent a copy to his tablet from his cell phone. Long story short I kicked him out after confronting him. I was beyond hurt and his level of NO remorse is still painful to think about. He choose this "Online" chick over me, over our future. He also chose the game over us too. (when i say we, i mean me and my three teenage kids). He said he felt confused about his feelings for this girl. I told him he was probably being catfished but it is what it is. He is still talking to her and we have cut off all contact with each other. This is going from a relationship where I felt he was my best friend. We use to joke about all the time he spent on his game and i use to joke that he had "girlfriends" on there. He would laugh about it too but now its all over and this girl apparently has given him something i couldnt. I broke down a week ago and basically put my feelings out there, i basically said if you love me and love us then fight for me. He admitted he loved me but still felt conflicted about the girl.. I decided at that point that she can just have him. Im not going to compete with someone he may or may not ever meet. But its still so painful, the idea that a person could leave a real live person for someone on a video game. I just needed to vent really. Im sure over time I will feel better but right now Im just so bitter and so angry over all of it. I refuse to be his second choice, especially after 7 yrs of being together. 

Polga
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Joined: 02/17/2014 - 11:33am
Welcome Toni

Welcome Toni

Thanks for sharing, so sorry about your situation . You are not alone. There are many stories on the spouse forums with similar problems to yourself.

I'm not excusing his behaviour, but the "fake " bonds that form from these online interactions are very strong. They can hi-jack the rational brain. That is the danger of these interactions in the game...that they can easily lead to problems with real life relationships. The lack of empathy or feeling he had for how you feel can be a product of his addiction. They are not the people we first knew when they are addicted. In time, he may come to his senses about what he has thrown away. But that does not help you now.

I think your reaction is a very healthy one indeed. If you come back here to read the site it may help you to process what has happened. It will help you know what you want in a new relationship sometime in the future.

All the best to you

Polga

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nyflgrl
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Last seen: 2 years 9 months ago
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Thank you for your kind words

Thank you for your kind words Polga, I will check out the other posts on here. 

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