Hello OLGA ANON community!
Wanted to say hello to the members, and encourage everyone struggling. I haven't been here in over a month, but during this time, I've avoided videogames!
I got rid of the games by (FINALLY) putting a password on my laptop's BIOS, making the password complicated/impossible to remember, then gave the password (on a piece of paper) to my girlfriend. Seemed to work. I didn't try to play games on other computers because I'm so fed up with my gaming self...However, I did try to avoid prolonged exposure to computers, which makes me want to play games.
I was erratic, tortured and depressed shortly after abandoning the games. I got addicted to Stephen King fiction books (though Carrie and the Shining are still better than games), I got addicted to food (for a few days, I couldn't be full, just wanted to keep eating and eating). I guess I'm still addicted to food, but I'm controlling myself by getting full with vegetables ^_^. Hard to be addicted to vegetables......O.o
On the positive side, I opened up my imaginative self, I've been sleeping a lot more, I feel better, healthier, cleaner, brighter, sharper, more myself, and I seem to really care about what happens to me in this world. I don't feel suicidal at all---in fact, I worry about not finishing all my goals before I die! ^_^ I'm fighting for my goals in my life now...just like any sane healthy person should.
It was good to take a break from Olga-Anon. I guess I was addicted to this site (yes, still better to videogames). Giving the password of my PC to my gf was a great idea. I did the cold turkey method, and so far so good.
I'm not gonna lie, going away from games is like going through hell. It really is hell, and there's no way around it. It's also really tough to see my life in ruins--kind of another punishment...3 semesters of failed college, bad relationships, lack of good friends (just gamers), job that doesn't fit me at all. Sometimes it feels like it would FEEL easier to go back, but now, there's no going back. I was on the path to a premature death. I really was. You have to live in this world. And as bad as things look, they could be far far worse---I could still be addicted to games, getting nowhere in my life. Even the subsequent addictions: the reading of novels, researching Science fiction stories, and food, well, they aren't as damaging as the games were, since I'm aware of these new addictions and can control them. When you're at the bottom, life is looking up, up and up, and I have a lot to look forward to and fight for! ^_^
Final Word and Self-Warning and Considerations:
I'm typing from the PC that I played my life away on. When I first booted the computer and entered the password, I really wanted to play Fallout...ha. I deleted the **** game and prevailed. But I feel like I should limit my time on this computer...maybe only use it when someone else is in the room. I'm considering buying a mini-PC that only functions as a word processor, so I can use it to safely write the book that I've been imagining.
Thank you Olga-Anon for being here for addicts' recovery. I'm so glad such a site exists to help people like me. I want to thank the founders of this page, and the people who have sponsored this site. I'll keep coming back to post progress and encourage others too.