I relapsed...and blech..it was awful!!

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Last seen: 5 years 9 months ago
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Joined: 02/14/2014 - 5:46pm
I relapsed...and blech..it was awful!!

It's been a few days now..going through the darn withdrawals again, but I feel better this time, stronger. I saw what a waste of time it was...and said my proper goodbyes.

I also started therapy for some issues that happened ingame and in rl..I see that I need to do that...feeling scared, but better.

I wrote yesterday, today and worked in my yard..solid, positive things that I can see.:)

I'm facing my "avoidance" of the internet as well...I think that figured into the relapse..I was trying so hard to just squish it ALL out..(okay, a grown woman saying squish..but squishing doesn't work).

...working on balance.:)

Played two years at an MMO, started as an hour here, or there, ended with me being there 10 hours a day. Became overly involved in a "game-relationship" that started carrying over into my RL and caused many, MANY, problems. Also stopped contact with "game-friends" because of their own game-addictions. Game-free since Sept. 2013.
Starting to feel much better and the withdrawal symptoms are lessening. I have limited myself to two days online a week, for only two hours, until I'm six months into my recovery. Then a third day. Thank you for this site.:)

YouAreNOTalone's picture
Last seen: 5 years 4 months ago
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Joined: 12/14/2013 - 11:24am
Hello tnimbus. Even if you

Hello tnimbus. Even if you relapse, don't give up. I relapsed hundreds of times until I finally came to my senses, sometimes for a few hours, sometimes for a couple of days. What really matters is to carry on fighting your addiction. From my (little) experience, keeping yourself busy is extremely important. We are all here for you. Best wishes to you

"The future is determined by our choices in the present." - Anonymous Author

Last seen: 5 years 8 months ago
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Joined: 05/12/2013 - 8:47pm
Yeah, relapses aren't worth

Yeah, relapses aren't worth it. Hugs. Glad you're back, and glad that you're taking some new steps to help yourself out. That's a good sign...if we want things to change, we've got to make changes... :)

When you're going through hell...keep going. --Winston Churchill There is no pit so deep that God is not deeper still --Corrie ten Boom

SheeshMode's picture
Last seen: 5 years 6 months ago
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Joined: 09/20/2012 - 8:01am
The only control an addict

The only control an addict has over 'not using' is the choice they make to get help and take the suggestions given to help them recover.

You're here now. We have a huge community filled with people willing to help you. (It helps keep us alive)

We'd love to help.

Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me to be realistic about the challenge I'm facing and to take good care of myself. If you need help PM me! I will gladly offer you whatever aid I can.

Last seen: 2 months 2 weeks ago
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Joined: 09/28/2012 - 6:29am
Hugs tnimbus, Many of us

Hugs tnimbus,

Many of us know the pain of relapsing, I know I certainly do. When I had my relapse last year I felt totally demoralised and overwhelmed. Some of my withdrawal symptoms were anxiety, feeling a sense of loss (couldn't go back to that site again and it felt like someone had died). Loss of sleep and bad dreams when I finally did sleep. They have now passed mostly and they will pass for you too.

thankyou for being brave enough to come back. We are in this together and we are all happy to support you getting back on the wagon.

i think it's a great idea to see a therapist as well as coming here, recovery often has a multi faceted treatment and each step you take towards wellness is a valuable one.

Cheers Tam

"It has become appallingly clear that our technology has surpassed our humanity"
Albert Einstein.

Last seen: 6 years 7 months ago
OLGA member
Joined: 05/22/2014 - 12:27pm
Some weeks ago I also

Some weeks ago I also relapsed after being computer-free for a month. I fastly got back to my usual habit and started playing so much that I again didn't go to school because of the heavy sleep deprivation that nearly-24/7 gaming caused to me. So I understood my mistake and once again I chose to get rid of my computer, bringing it to a "safe place", making it practically unreachable: even if I want to play, I'm not able to do it, because there's nothing to game with.

"Fear is the first of many foes". "Perseverance wins".
Definitely stopped playing on May 22, 2014.
My "higher power" is the fellowship.

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