Not sure if this goes here

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terindas
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Not sure if this goes here

Not sure if this goes here or not. I will probably be talking about it a lil bit at tonites meeting as well.

Today we had my wifes families christmas party. It had already been a long day cause I worked this morning, and had to drive 2 hrs straight there after work. When I got there everything was almost normal ( wasent exactely feeling well ulcers ). We opened presents, had some usual family tid bits, laughs ya know the normal stuff.

Thats when I saw it......

My wifes lil cousin hoped on his grandmothers ( place where we were ) computer and started playing star wars online. I was fine at first but after about maybe ten minutes I started going a lil nuts.....all i wanted to do was kick him off and play.....

i tried dealing with it for maybe another ten minutes, and wasent going so well. Thats when I stood up and told my wife I had to leave. I had been telling her what I was feeling and she said she understood. I grabbed a couple things and just left without really syaing good bye to people. My ab was just going nuts.

Its about a hr drive home from there and i ended up crying atleast half way and had to pull over twice cause I couldnt see really well. When I got home took a nice warm shower held my dogs ( well one at at time there big dogs ) and jsut layed in bed for a while. When my wife got home we talked a bit about what had happened and she bacially and literally told me she was proud of me for not letting it get me, for not relapsing.

This was by far the hardest thing I have had to deal with so far. I am glad I could control it ( kinda ) it gives me hope.

Thanks for reading :)

dan1
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Man, you did the right

Man, you did the right thing. Kudos. If it's triggering you, you got to get out. Bottom line. And run, don't walk is the right way to do it. When a craving hits me, I've got to get away from whatever is causing it, and if it's my AB all by itself, I need to call someone and tell them what is going on.

Also, kudos to your wife for being supportive. She didn't freak out, blame you for dissing her family, do any of five other unsupportive things. Outstanding. That good support at home is wonderful.

Best wishes.

I am a recovering computer game and gambling addict. My recovery birthday: On May 6, 2012 I quit games and began working a program of recovery through OLGA No computer games or slot games for me since December 12, 2012. No solitaire games with real cards since June 2013.

Patria
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That is absolutely awesome!

That is absolutely awesome! Good for you!!! I've been there too. I faced an incredibly huge "need" to do my addiction again at a party, and I somehow asked my husband to take me home. He did. But I felt like my legs weighed 100 lbs each. I barely made it out the door.

And your wife is wonderful too! She is very supportive and that's awesome.

I'm very proud of you. Big hugs!

dusty0
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 You did a great job

You did a great job recognizing that you were having a problem and then doing sobering about it! Half the time I don't realize something is wrong until it's too late. The other half of the time I choose to suffer rather than take a stand for myself. I'm glad your wife was there to support you and be proud of you (you deserve it).

Maggie
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Hugs Terindas. You did good

Hugs Terindas. You did good and I am proud of you.

It's good to have goals and dreams, but while you're waiting for things to change, waiting for promises to come to pass, don't be discontent with where you are. Learn to enjoy the season that you're in--Pastor Joel Osteen

LearningSerenity
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You did great, and it's cool

You did great, and it's cool that your wife supported you in it as well. Walking out on ANYBODY is acceptable if the alternative is to relapse, and no apologies or explanations are needed from you at that moment. If people ask later, you can say that something came up and you needed to leave (perfectly true), but there's no need to elaborate on what came up or why it required you to leave. You did exactly what you needed to do, and you have every right to be pleased with yourself. Hugs...

When you're going through hell...keep going. --Winston Churchill There is no pit so deep that God is not deeper still --Corrie ten Boom

Rob87
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I can relate to your story.

I can relate to your story. Thanks for sharing!

Hugz

Born in 1987, the Netherlands | Recovering addict since January 2013.
During treatment of addiction I began to acknowledge the problem.
One day at a time; trying my best to live the solution.
Just for Today; I have a choice.

terindas
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Thanks all your support and

Thanks all your support and reashurrance means alot to me in my recovery.

AnotherAddict
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Hey terindas,  You should

Hey terindas, You should be proud of yourself for staying strong. Hang in there !

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