Relationship and Motivation

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Last seen: 7 years 4 months ago
OLGA member
Joined: 01/30/2014 - 3:21pm
Relationship and Motivation


i just want to share this because it is a major milestone in my progress and the confusion it caused me actually made me look for an internship and i instantly got one after not searching for 1/2 a year. All in all i learned tons of stuff about me i.e. my good intution about that it wouldnt work out for a longterm relationship. But i don't regret that experience at all !

Anyway this is the story:

She moved in the same flat, we both like(d) each another and both felt attracted. 1 Month later i wasnt curious anymore and it just happened. We both had a lot of fun for like 2-3 weeks, afterwards it was like a rollercoaster of feelings. At some point i felt really really sad and somehow i managed to get the motivation to search for the intership. After a few days we started the affair again which was way more intense then before. It just lasted for a few days/nights, afterwards i had a relapse because it was to much confusion for me. We spoke yesterday and i actually wanted it to be over ... today i feel the opposite today. I enjoyed beeing confused and not to be in control with another person. Now i'am struggling with sadness and (false) hope for that it might work out somehow...but i know it won't.

I have professional help/family/friends and olga. I am not expecting a "masterplan" advice, more likely for comments. So i'm willing to find my own way.

Thx for reading this

Something like trying to protect yourself all the time, things like trying to outwit fate. Those things can be the worst thing you can do for yourself.
-- John Frusciante

Last seen: 9 years 8 months ago
OLGA member
Joined: 07/22/2014 - 7:34pm
Thanks for sharing   Now

Thanks for sharing

Now I'm confused

Its just a click away, but I'm not going to play. Though I've relapsed many times in the past, I feel confident, again, I quit, and that's it.

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