Is anyone here addicted to 50 Shades of Grey Role Play

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SCRich
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Is anyone here addicted to 50 Shades of Grey Role Play

I am looking for any resources and insight with 50 Shades of Grey Role Play on Twitter and WeChat. My wife has been an addict for several years now but it was not untill recently untill' I realized how inappropriate some of the relationships have become and how some have left RP and crossed into true life by using real names, real current situations in both of their lives and even relating with words like Babe and I love you.

I know I can't stop it but I am trying to learn more about it so I can deal with it properly.

Thanks!

Rich

Andrew_Doan
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There are people here

There are people here addicted to Second Life and sexual role play. Search YouTube for Second Life and sex. This is very similar to 50 Shades of Grey.

Andrew Doan MD PhD

My Videos: Internet gaming disorder is real & my story 

*The views expressed are of the author's and do not necessarily reflect the official policy of the U.S. Navy or Department of Defense.

SCRich
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I see that second life is a

I see that second life is a game, not into gaming never was but it looks like the old game "The Sims" . What she is addicted to is Twitter where people actually tweet as if it were real life and have families on Twitter and play out situations as if they followed the lines of 50 shades. They have babies, affairs, drama etc... They post photos that they get off the internet that represent their person or life...baby photos for example. In some cases not sure if all of them these families have "writers" who actually write a story line that these people follow as if it were a play on Broadway!

i searched second life and sex on you tube but got a bunch of stuff related to the second life game not role play PLAY or story line if you want to call it that.

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It's similar. Second Life

It's similar. Second Life facilitates role play.

Andrew Doan MD PhD

My Videos: Internet gaming disorder is real & my story 

*The views expressed are of the author's and do not necessarily reflect the official policy of the U.S. Navy or Department of Defense.

SCRich
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Thank You I will look into

Thank You I will look into that further.

Andrew_Doan
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SCRich wrote: Thank You I
SCRich wrote:

Thank You I will look into that further.

Here are some articles. Twitter and social media, similar to Second Life, are modalities for delivery of content and communication. However, users can use these methods for "role play".

Warning Game Images In Articles and Links

http://www.theguardian.com/technology/2008/nov/13/second-life-divorce

http://www.nbcnews.com/id/18139090/ns/technology_and_science-games/t/virtual-affair-real-world-infidelity/#.VR-7kJTF9aI

http://www.anjelsyndicate.org/2011/10/10/beyond-the-screen-six-years-in-second-life-a-love-affair/

http://secondlife.com/destinations/adult/roleplaying

Having kids/families in Second Life

https://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=second+life+child+birth

Second Life Weddings

https://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=second+life+weddings

Andrew Doan MD PhD

My Videos: Internet gaming disorder is real & my story 

*The views expressed are of the author's and do not necessarily reflect the official policy of the U.S. Navy or Department of Defense.

SCRich
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I saw a story on the OWN

I saw a story on the OWN network CyberJ directed me to. It was so sad...I have had issues at times with FB myself but never unrealistic or uber compulsive. Actually when I was informed of her desire for a divorce I gathered some comtact info for a few friends and within a week deactivated my account, it's been 2 months now I log in every 28 days and deactivate it again. I do this so I can focus on my situation and dedicate my time to wife and children.

i think the core issue is we have very few friends, we live in a rural area have no local family (I have zero family other than her and the kids) and all we do is work and home. Twitter made her some friends which is healthy and perfectly fine but this fifty shades of grey was dangerous territory which then led her to I think the compulsion and eventually emotional disconnection.

Now her role play husband gets more attention and the I love You instead of me. She says its just words but that is just protection/denial that she has cheated on me since its on private chats and they have crossed to personal names and she shares family experiences and information. I see the problem as a grave one. For her to cut off the inappropriate relations she would need to withdraw from Twitter which means giving up her "family" as they call themselves which is all of her friends. The other theory I have is that for her to do that she would also break the story line if this on-line family and potentially have it fall apart.

As crazy as it may sound she feels a duty not to let them down although it's destroying her real life family. I will be honest I had been a less than optimum husband and father over the past couple of years, it's not all her fault but when the addiction took over and started affecting the family and I did not see it as serious as it was it just made me more of a jerk and more of a reason for her to be driven to a fantasy life. She never spoke to me or told me what was going on the moment I was told she was not happy, not happy enough to continue in this marrage the bullsh** stopped. I was told what was wrong what bothered her and changed that very moment for her and the family. I have been a text book husband for 2 months now...problem is she says she feels empty and loves me but is not in love with me. My forced PHd on this over the past 2 months is telling me that I can not replace the desire in her heart because she has closed off long ago and replaced that need for emotion and affection with her on line friends and "husband". Sadly untill someone other than me makes her see that, that the lack of care for me or love will continue while she allows others to replace it instead of me.

i have read in many places that emotions and love are a learned feeling, not just something that happens. You learn to love during courtship that happens usually due to an initial physical attraction or in some cases a mutual desire or interest. Many professionals say it's not too late and people will love each other again but it needs to start by kindness, forgiveness and actions on both parts. Basically the dating courtship all over again, although it may happen quicker than the first time or possibly longer if trust is an issue. :-( right now sadly for me it would be longer, although I was not the perfect husband I was NOT the adulterer never had never will and although she stopped loving me I continue with pain. This will surely take some time!

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Andrew, the links you

Andrew, the links you provided were pretty scary! Seems like the more people reinforce a fantasy on a day to day basis, the more the fantasy becomes real. The side effects of these online role-playing games bear a striking resemblance to schizophrenia.

Excessive Gaming Causes Brain Changes Similar to Addicts, Schizophrenics
http://www.schizophrenic.com/news/schizophrenia-research/excessive-gaming-causes-brain-changes-similar-addicts-schizophrenics

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SCRich wrote:  i think the
SCRich wrote:

i think the core issue is we have very few friends, we live in a rural area have no local family (I have zero family other than her and the kids) and all we do is work and home.

Your insight validates a theory I am researching about the "Dunbar Factor" and online addictions. I explain in this short video clip:

https://www.facebook.com/video.php?v=848559021869372

SCRich wrote:

i have read in many places that emotions and love are a learned feeling, not just something that happens. You learn to love during courtship that happens usually due to an initial physical attraction or in some cases a mutual desire or interest. Many professionals say it's not too late and people will love each other again but it needs to start by kindness, forgiveness and actions on both parts. Basically the dating courtship all over again, although it may happen quicker than the first time or possibly longer if trust is an issue. :-( right now sadly for me it would be longer, although I was not the perfect husband I was NOT the adulterer never had never will and although she stopped loving me I continue with pain. This will surely take some time!

Being a gaming addict that played for 10+ years (of my 18 years of marriage) where weekly I devoted 50 to 100 hours weekly in gaming, my marriage was in shambles. My wife filed for divorce, we were separted for 6 months, and she filed a restraining order against me. There are fun drunks and angry drunks. There are fun gamers and angry gamers. I am the angry gamer and very abusive. Therefore, by the grace of GOD, we didn't divorce, but I had to start over building our marriage. This website and the concept of the "love bank" really helped our marriage!

http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi3200_love.html

Andrew Doan MD PhD

My Videos: Internet gaming disorder is real & my story 

*The views expressed are of the author's and do not necessarily reflect the official policy of the U.S. Navy or Department of Defense.

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CyberJ wrote: Andrew, the
CyberJ wrote:

Andrew, the links you provided were pretty scary! Seems like the more people reinforce a fantasy on a day to day basis, the more the fantasy becomes real. The side effects of these online role-playing games bear a striking resemblance to schizophrenia.

Excessive Gaming Causes Brain Changes Similar to Addicts, Schizophrenics
http://www.schizophrenic.com/news/schizophrenia-research/excessive-gaming-causes-brain-changes-similar-addicts-schizophrenics

CyberJ, watch my video where I explain the affects of ALL addictions on the hypothalamus-pituitary-adrenal (HPA) axis:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YCxoHvKRyfE

Then, consider this that HPA Dysregulation is believed to cause atypical mental illnesses: depression, anxiety, schizophrenia, ect... :

Is Dysregulation of the HPA-Axis a Core Pathophysiology Mediating Co-Morbid Depression in Neurodegenerative Diseases?

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/25806005

"The hypothalamic-pituitary-adrenal (HPA)-axis is a key neuroendocrine signaling system involved in physiological homeostasis and stress response. Disturbances of this system lead to severe hormonal imbalances, and the majority of such patients also present with behavioral deficits and/or mood disorders. Dysregulation of the HPA-axis is also strongly implicated in the pathology of major depressive disorder."

Andrew Doan MD PhD

My Videos: Internet gaming disorder is real & my story 

*The views expressed are of the author's and do not necessarily reflect the official policy of the U.S. Navy or Department of Defense.

SCRich
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Andrew!! Thank you very

Andrew!! Thank you very similar to what I had read here and there but much more in depth. I am trying to do the same thing....been 2 months now. Making deposit after deposit but she is still very apprehensive of making any deposits...afraid actually I think. a divorce is a big decision and takes guts to say....now that she is said it I think she is afraid to go back to open and vulnerable after gaining the courage to come out and say they want a divorce and finding out it may fail and having to start all over again to get to the divorce part.

But I continue and hope she will let her guard down for a day or two and continue once she feels something again. There is a web site that I first read about this...I sent her the link and she blew it off. Said she would be nice but forget affection or intimate moments. Not part of my thoughts....my attorney friend tells me she has committed adultery in the court of law here in this state. If I have sex with her and she can prove it the courts accept that as my approval and forgiveness of the emotional affair losing my stand in court. I am holding out on that till' I am sure we are stable again.

http://tolovehonorandvacuum.com/2014/06/how-to-love-your-spouse-again/

Another link I found helpful...

http://www.helpguide.org/articles/relationships/relationship-help.htm

http://www.helpguide.org/articles/addiction/internet-and-computer-addiction.htm

Rich

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Rich, hang in there. This

Rich, hang in there. This sexual role-play is destructive!

Andrew Doan MD PhD

My Videos: Internet gaming disorder is real & my story 

*The views expressed are of the author's and do not necessarily reflect the official policy of the U.S. Navy or Department of Defense.

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I've seen alot of the same

I've seen alot of the same going on in IMVU Dom/sub relationships. I knew someone that focused on mind control and he would boast on how he could manipulate a woman to do things on IMVU and Skyping with them. He almost had me drawn in, luckily I snapped out of it and wrecked the friendship/relationship I had with him. I cut all ties with him.

IMVU; my vice, my addiction.

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