Playing non-game of choice

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monuma
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Playing non-game of choice

Hello all,

I posted this question in the friends/family forum, but wanted the advice of some gaming addicts too.

A friend of mine (28years old) is addicted to gaming, though he has not ever admitted it to me.  I’ve known him for a very long time, and I am one of the few people that he is able to open up to.  I am in a different fellowship of recovery and I think that I am a good influence in his life: I get him to talk about his feelings and I help him to resist his tendency to isolate himself.  

However, he lives far away.  I am trying to figure out an activity that we can do together as a bonding experience.  The obvious answer is play games online, but I don’t want to enable him.  We’ve discussed playing a game that is not his game-of-choice, one which he does not enjoy in and of itself but would play for my sake.  

I want to know whether this would be enabling behavior?  

Lastly, is it my place to get in touch with his parents and encourage them to look into resources for online gaming addictions?  I mean, he lives with his parents and they let him game, which is enabling.  

 

Thanks ,

Megan

wazzapp
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This is a tricky subject,

This is a tricky subject, difficult to give a "safe" recommendation. 

I was playing board-games for 1-2 months when i quit gaming, i think that might have helped. It didnt stick with me though.

Never alone, go to meetings <3 Mumble voice meetings on cgaa are great, see you there <3

 

kaspur3
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Slippery Slope

Hi monuma.  I'm a gaming addict and have been very deep back in my addiction.  I can tell you, at least from my experience, is that there isn't a 'non game of choice' for me.  Again, for me.  I love playing games, and it doesn't matter whether it's console or iPhone apps.  For me, it's about the escape from reality, filling a void, wanting to isolate, etc.

For me, it's akin to asking a drug addict to switch to another drug that they don't use so that you can still get high to be friends and do something together.  (Again, this is my experience!)  Please note that I keep saying "For me", because I can't speak for others and their experiences.  

Are there other social sites you can use to stay in touch?  Facebook, instagram, etc.?   If gaming is the only way you can keep in touch, then it may not be for the best to stay in touch.   It may be really hard, but sometimes the best thing for an addict is to hit bottom, which is to lose friends, family members, etc.  That's how it worked for me (and again which brought me to a new bottom recently). 

 

-kas

 

It is better to light a candle than to curse the darkness (E.R.)

Clean Date: not really sure anymore...

monuma
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Thanks

Thank you for your comments.  It's helpful to get the opinions of gamers to know how I can best be a good influence to my friend.

After having a long conversation with him on the topic, I decided not to play any video games with him.  Thank you for your advice.

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