Powerlessness and unmanageability

5 posts / 0 new
Last post
LearningSerenity
Offline
Last seen: 4 years 3 months ago
OLGA member
Joined: 05/12/2013 - 8:47pm
Powerlessness and unmanageability

This is from NA's Basic Text where it talks about Step 1. The word "drugs" has been replaced with "games", but that is the only change I have made to the text. This is from the 6th edition...

"A second admission must be made before our foundation is complete. If we stop here, we will know only half the truth. We are great ones for manipulating the truth. We say on one hand, 'Yes, I am powerless over my addiction,' and on the other hand, 'When I get my life together, I can handle [games].' Such thoughts and actions led us back to active addiction. It never occurred to us to ask, 'If we can't control our addiction, how can we control our lives?' We felt miserable without [games], and our lives were unmanageable.

"Unemployability, dereliction and destruction are easily seen as characteristics of an unmanageable life. Our families generally are disappointed, baffled and confused by our actions and often desert or disown us. Becoming employed, socially acceptable and reunited with our families does not make our lives manageable. Social acceptability does not equal recovery."

When you're going through hell...keep going. --Winston Churchill There is no pit so deep that God is not deeper still --Corrie ten Boom

LearningSerenity
Offline
Last seen: 4 years 3 months ago
OLGA member
Joined: 05/12/2013 - 8:47pm
Two things stand out to me

Two things stand out to me in this section. First, I had never thought about the fact that it is absurd for me to simultaneously acknowledge my incapacity to control my addiction while clinging to the idea that I can control my own life. Addiction was my best answer to the problem of life, and I think that I can control something that is actually the source of a problem that's too big for me to control? The logic behind that thinking is badly flawed, to say the least...

The second thing that stands out to me is the statement "social acceptability does not equal recovery." This helps me remember the fact that the goal of recovery is not social acceptability...social acceptability is a byproduct of recovery. If I make social acceptability my goal, I am not only selling myself short, but I'm setting myself up for failure, because I'll think that I've finally arrived at recovery when I'm still oceans away from the real goal (which will take the rest of my life to reach). It makes me think of a saying I heard once..."aim for the moon...because if you miss, at least you'll be up with the stars." Why aim for a low-ball goal like social acceptability when the goal I should be aiming for is a completely transformed mind and way of life?

When you're going through hell...keep going. --Winston Churchill There is no pit so deep that God is not deeper still --Corrie ten Boom

Patria
Patria's picture
Offline
Last seen: 1 year 1 month ago
OLGA member
Joined: 06/02/2011 - 1:55am
This is excellent LS! Thank

This is excellent LS! Thank you for posting.

LS wrote:

It never occurred to us to ask, 'If we can't control our addiction, how can we control our lives?'

Me either. I said the same thing "once I get free of games (or alcohol) I can then choose to control my life". Where on earth did I get the idea that this is reality? Yet I not only said it, I hear it from a lot of newcomers: "I know I can't control games, but don't tell me how to live my life."

And what a great thought: ' "aim for the moon...because if you miss, at least you'll be up with the stars." Why aim for a low-ball goal like social acceptability when the goal I should be aiming for is a completely transformed mind and way of life?'

I'm much more apt to want to be "accepted" by others, when in reality my goal is to be accepted by HP.

Exavatar (not verified)
This is so important!  To

This is so important! To me, I have to constantly remind myself that I am always recovering and that I've made a promise to myself, my sponsor, my husband, and to my life to focus on my recovering and not going back to gaming. It's a constant thing and that's why I came back here. I need as much support and constant reminders of this so that I stay game free. And not only for games, but to look at what's underneath the addiction so that I don't have any more addictions.

Thanks for posting this!

Gettingalife
Offline
Last seen: 5 years 1 month ago
OLGA member
Joined: 12/11/2011 - 5:41pm
LearningSerenity wrote: It
LearningSerenity wrote:

It makes me think of a saying I heard once..."aim for the moon...because if you miss, at least you'll be up with the stars." Why aim for a low-ball goal like social acceptability when the goal I should be aiming for is a completely transformed mind and way of life?

This is it. And when this has not been my habit of mind and behavior for years -if ever-, it takes reminding myself, beginning again each day and day after day to begin it, to stay with it, to let go of the old habits.

Acceptance. When I am disturbed, it is because a person, place, thing, or situation is unacceptable to me. I find no serenity until I accept my life as being exactly the way it is meant to be. Nothing happens in God’s world by mistake.  Acknowledge the problem, but live the solution!

Log in or register to post comments